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“But I’m more glad you’re here.”
“Me too.”
He doesn’t ask anything else, so I take the reprieve. We drink our coffee in the quiet kitchen while the sky turns pink.
After a while, I clear my throat. “What are you going to do?”
“About what?”
“The hiatus. You’ve been quiet about it.”
Nikko lets out a small huff and sets his mug down.
“When you decided to stop, I was so pissed at you guys.”
“I know.”
“I’m the youngest one at the table, Fox. You four could all decide you’re done with touring. You can still record, but I’m a tour manager. What do I do with a band that isn’t touring? I’m thirty-five. I’m not ready to be done.”
“None of us are done. It’s a hiatus, not a retirement.”
“Feels like a retirement when nobody’s talking about the next tour.”
“Yeah, I get that.”
He runs his hand through his hair. “I’ve been thinking about it since the decision was made. I don’t want to just…sit. I will lose my mind if I do that.”
“What are you thinking?”
“I want to build something. Start small. I keep coming back to this idea of an independent label. Really small, but get your manager Daisy in on it with me. Bring on artists I believe in, handle them properly, give them a chance to grow without the machine chewing them up.” He glances at me. “Like The Winter Sons.”
I raise an eyebrow. “The Winter Sons, huh?”
“Yeah, I mean, you saw how good they are, right? Augie’s voice is just… Fuck, I can’t even describe it.”
I smile. “His voice. Sure.”
“I know what you’re thinking, but you can unthink it. Yeah, he’s gorgeous, but he has a daughter, so he’s probably not into men. I didn’t really get a vibe from him that night at the bar gig.”
“But you were looking for a vibe.”
He leans back on his chair. “Bro, I’m always looking for a vibe. But anyway, they’re a good band. Musically speaking. And they’re super nice too.”
I hide my mouth behind the mug. Nikko rolls his eyes at me.
“Anyway,” he continues. “That’s what I’ve been thinking. I don’t know if it’s a good idea. I don’t know if I can do it. I don’t know anything about running a label. But it’s what I keep coming back to.”
“You’d be great at it.”
“You think?”
“Nik. You’ve been managing four grown men and a road crew of thirty for over a decade. Running a small label would be a downgrade in complexity.”
He laughs, and it dawns on me that we haven’t had a real conversation like this in months. After we got home after the last tour and decided the band needed a break, life was all about Nina and the baby. I guess I avoided talking to Nikko about it because I knew how hurt he was by the decision.
“What about you?” he asks.
I stop with my mug halfway to my mouth.
