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I elbow him in the ribs. He lies. My social standing at school wouldn’t have allowed him to ask me out. “You were not. I was awkward and mean.”

He nibbles on my ear. “What do you mean, you were? Your awkwardness and cruelty are why I like you so much. I’m a sucker for punishment, baby.”

I turn to face him, and his pretty dark eyes flash with amusement. I frown as a tightness rises in my chest. It’s time to tell him why I came on this trip.

He matches my frown with one of his own and presses a kiss to my brow. “It’s true, baby. I wanted you the second I saw you blushing in that cafeteria. What do I have to do to show you how much I want you? I’m falling so hard for you, London King.”

I bite my cheek and close my eyes as a coppery taste fills my mouth. I imagine Micah’s hands inside me as I withered and dripped in pleasure beneath him, bearing everything for him. That, and Nigel’s smug fucking smirk as he threatened me. The two people who can ruin what I’m building with Maison.

Heat balloons in my chest, despite the cool air around me, and I’m about to kiss him when Ezra’s voice cuts through the air like a sharp knife. “Everyone, get the fuck out of bed. There’s work to do.”

I groan as Maison jumps up like a dutiful pet, and he urges me out of bed. I quickly pull on a few layers of clothes and pull the hood up over my head before crawling outside. I’m almost blinded by how bright it is. The sun shining over the snow, the crystals, the frost wrapped around every branch. It shimmers over every rock, making the water shine a brilliant blue. It looks like a holiday card, and if I wasn’t so terrified of it, I’d say it was beautiful.

The lingering sick feeling I constantly carry hits me full force. Jade and Thomas are out there somewhere. They left yesterday, so they would have spent the night in this.

Ezra and James stand by the water, discussing their plans, probably debating how to handle this, especially with some of us missing. Ollie and Nathan are busy tending to the fire. Nigel, of course, is nowhere in sight, and neither are Naomi and Serena. I expect to see Micah somewhere, but I wonder if he even spent the night here. Ever since our interaction at my cove, his distance has increased. Like he can’t stand the sight of me and avoids all of us. He’s certainly not leading us like we need him to. Little by little, and day by day, Ezra is taking over that role.

Maison nudges my arm. “Stay here a second. I’ll find out what’s happening.”

I join Ollie and Nathan by the fire and warm my hands over the flames. The humid air is already seeping into my bones. Micah emerges from the woods, and his eyes meet mine briefly as the others walk over. He gives me no hint of emotion, and I can’t help but notice the wildness in his eyes. Like being here, with us, is not natural. The wilderness, being alone in the woods, is where he belongs, where he’s happiest. Sometimes he seems more out of place here than I do. I wonder if he spends the night alone because it’s a place no one can hear him scream. As if his pain doesn’t exist as long as no one is there to hear it.

The other boys join us at the fire, and Naomi and Serena emerge from the woods as well, holding wet kindling. Ezra paces as he begins his tyrannical speech, “We need to prepare for winter. These shelters won’t last long-term; they’re shit. Also, we need to hunt bigger game. No more small prey. We need to go after deer.”

“What about Jade and Thomas?” I ask. “Are we just going to leave them out there? We should go after them. Send a small group to find them and bring them back.”

Ezra cocks a brow. “Don’t be stupid, London. We have to look out for the betterment of everyone, not just one or two people.”

Micah steps forward, causing Ezra to twitch and snap his head at him, clearly not enjoying being interrupted. “We can’t afford to lose anyone. They have to figure it out for themselves. I gave them a route; they will be fine.”

I fold my arms. “They weren’t prepared for weather like this. They have no shelter, nothing. They could die out there, and your plan is to just… leave them? We can get by on fish and rabbits for a few days; we need to find them.”

“We could all die out here,” Naomi snaps, walking over and standing next to Ezra. She too looks less like herself day by day as her pretty face loses some of its plumpness. Her cheeks sink in onto themselves, and even her blond hair looks duller, less golden.

For the first time, Micah’s eyes soften and he actually looks human, like how he looked and felt when I kissed him. Then I remember it’s his best friend out there, too. He’d be a monster if he didn’t care a little. “They volunteered to go, London,” he says to me. “They knew what they were getting into. I’ve taught them everything I can.”

Maison walks up and places his arm around me. “Come on, babe. Thomas is strong, and Jade is smart. I think they will be okay. I bet they will be back tomorrow.”

I don’t like it… any of it. We should go after them.

My eyes find Micah, his eyes shadowed under his black hood. “Is this the kind of group you want to lead, Micah?” I say, finally looking at him. The first real words I’ve uttered to him since the incident. My icy coolness toward him is met with equal animosity over the past couple of days, making it very easy to avoid and hate him. I’m not sure if Maison’s noticed the clear tension between us, but I make sure Maison knows he’s the one I want every chance I can, and that Micah sees it.

The twins exchange a glance, and Micah seems unfazed by the comment. Instead, his eyebrows arch. “We’ll need extra wood for the next few days to keep the fire lit. Can you handle that, London?”

I nod, then roll my eyes. “Fine.”

Fuck this.

Without uttering a single word, I extricate myself from Maison’s arms and trudge into the dense woods, where I come across Nigel lurking in his shadowy corner of the world. I assume he’s only come out to scavenge for food since he hasn’t interacted with anyone since Jade left. I head down the shore away from him, grateful Micah sent me away. I have to take careful steps as the snow has made the ground more slippery than normal, and my feet crunch atop the thin layer still not burned off from the sun. Most of the snow has melted or is melting.

I take nearly an hour to calm down my raging nerves, but I find dry wood underneath a few fallen trees. At one point I even rip bark off a dead tree, pulling it so hard my fingers bleed. I repeatedly return with wood, keeping my head down as I add it to the pile. I saw Naomi and Serena doing the same earlier, so I guess it’s nice to know Micah wasn’t specifically picking on me.

Hours go by, and I’m nearly drenched in sweat by the time I’m done. My knees are weak, and I can barely walk as I approach the camp from my last trip.

Naomi is standing alone by the fire, everyone else off doing something or resting, I’m assuming. She’s holding something, and my stomach drops at the sight of my leather-bound journal in her hands. She’s flicking through it, reading every fucking word.

My words… my private words.

This is low, even for Naomi. I’ve kept that journal hidden in my bag, hidden from Maison, Nigel, everyone. She must have snooped through my stuff. I drop the wood and run up to her. “Give that back, Naomi. Right now. I’m not kidding. Give that back.”