Page 49

“I get that,” I said. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me or justify your decisions.”

“I appreciate you saying that, but I still feel like I owe you an explanation. You’re one of my best friends, Lo.”

“Honestly, I hate that you felt like you couldn’t tell me,” I finally admitted. It wasn’t the fact that he’d kept it a secret; it was the idea that he felt he couldn’t come to me.

He lowered his head to his chest, and I placed my hand on my back, sensing his struggle. “The first person I came out to…” He clenched his jaw, and I could see so much pain in his eyes. “Let’s just say that it did not go well. And that experience really scarred me. It made me feel like it wasn’t safe or okay to be myself. Can you imagine how my teammates, how my opponents, would treat me if they knew I was gay?”

My heart ached for my brother. I hated that he’d felt the need to hide this huge part of himself, but I understood. “I get it, and I’m glad you’re telling me now. This guy you’re seeing must be pretty special.”

Levi smiled softly. “He is.” And it made my chest warm to see his happiness.

I gave his hand a squeeze before releasing him. “I can’t wait to meet him. Do Mom and Dad know?”

Levi nodded, a shy smile on his face. I wasn’t sure I’d ever seen him like this—so happy and open and just…free.

“Yeah. Mom met him when she attended my last game. They really hit it off. Dad knows, but they haven’t met yet.”

I wrapped my arms around him in a hug. “I love you. Always. And if someone is rude or hurtful to you, I will kick their ass. Because I am, and will always be, your big sister.”

“My little big sister,” he joked.

I rolled my eyes, laughing as I swiped away a tear. “Don’t make me pin you to the ground, broseph. Because I will.”

He chuckled, fending me off. I released him. I stood, straightening my top before heading out to the living room where Dad was watching a football game. I sank down on the couch, still processing, while Mom and Levi busied themselves in the kitchen.

My phone buzzed, and I nearly dropped it when I saw who the text was from.

“Holy shit.” I stared down at the screen, unable to believe my eyes. Holy. Shit!

Dad jolted upright, and Mom ran in from the kitchen. “What’s wrong?”

I continued to stare at the screen of my phone where the text message was displayed.

Emerson Thorne-Crawford: Hey, Logan! So great to hear from you! Let’s get in touch after the holidays are over.

I immediately texted Carson, and he sent back a reply just as quickly.

Trouble: I told you she was excited to talk to you.

I was still staring at the screen when Levi spoke, his voice practically in my ear. “Ooh. Who’s Trouble?”

I jerked my head up so fast, I nearly headbutted him. “Jesus, Levi.” I smacked his shoulder. “Don’t sneak up on me like that.”

“I didn’t sneak up on you. I said your name several times as I approached, but you were too engrossed in your phone.”

“For good reason,” I said, shaking my head in disbelief. “I, uh—” I shoved my phone in the front pocket of my oversized Dartmouth hoodie. “You guys know how I’m kind of obsessed with Emerson Thorne-Crawford?”

“Kind of?” Levi barked out a laugh, Mom and Dad joining him.

“Yeah. Okay. So maybe that’s an understatement, but well…” How the heck was I going to explain this without revealing Trouble’s true identity? “A friend of mine ran into her, and they asked for her number for me. So I texted Emerson, not expecting anything because…” I made a “duh” gesture. “But she just texted me back.”

Mom gaped at me. “Emerson Thorne-Crawford. As in the Emerson Thorne-Crawford.”

“Yes.” I showed her the message from Emerson, rereading it aloud as if I needed the confirmation just as much as Mom did.

“You’re sure it’s not a prank?” Levi asked.

“It’s not a prank.” Levi might not trust Carson, but I did.