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I opened the front door for her, waving her out.

I was in the passenger seat of her car before she caught on.

She started shaking her head. “No. You don’t believe in church. You don’t believe in anything.”

“That’s an exaggeration. And I’d like to go. I’m curious, and I promise to behave.”

Finally she just started driving if only because I wouldn’t get out of her car.

Church was fine. I wasn’t sure what I was expecting, but everyone seemed sort of normal. In fact, everyone was very nice and welcoming.

Except for Ro. She was furious a few short minutes in.

We were in the lobby mingling before the service, Ro introducing me to her friends, because what else could she do?

“God bless,” I tried on a few of them. It seemed to float so I kept doing it.

She literally pulled me outside to chew me out. “They may not know you’re making fun of them,” she said, sounding livid, “but I do. And I don’t appreciate it.”

I raised my hands, and told her the truth, “I’m actually not. I’m trying to fit in. I heard a few of them say it, and I thought it was what I was supposed to say. I’ve never been inside of a church before, you know.” I paused. “You’ve met my father. How religious do you imagine my upbringing has been? But I’ve gotten off track. The point is, I’m being sincere, not snarky. You’re my friend and I’m trying to embrace the things that you find important. Isn’t that what friends do?”

She wasn’t charmed by my very charming speech. “That is not friendship stuff,” she said quietly. “That is boyfriend stuff and wholly inappropriate for us.”

“Why?” I asked her.

“Don’t start with your flair for the ridiculous again. I’m not a prize just because I left first.”

“No. You’re a prize because you’re perfect.”

“Knock it the hell off.”

I did. Sort of. “So I’m not welcome here, because I’m a skeptic? Is that how your church works?”

She sighed and I knew I’d won a small victory.

“Of course not,” she said with resignation. “It’s about community. You don’t have to believe. You just have to try. Try to listen, try to get something out of it, whatever it is you may be looking for, hopefully something that makes you a better person. That’s what church is to me. But if you’re going to be here, please just be respectful.

“I am. Truly. I like anything that helped make you who you are. I certainly respect that.”

We went back inside right as they were seating everyone in the room where the service would take place, the lobby swiftly clearing out.

We walked to the doorway, and as we looked for seats, Aaron saw us and waved.

He’d saved a seat for Ro, but only one. I shamelessly maneuvered my way into taking his seat, the sucker. Now that I was done wallowing in my broken heart, was in fact back in fighting shape, and had a plan, he was toast.

I had my arm around the back of Ro’s seat for the entire service, and she didn’t make a fuss about it, probably loath to make a scene. I decided then that I liked church, and that I would continue to go.

I didn’t get much out of the sermon, no profound revelations.

I didn’t have a great frame of reference for any of it, but I did what Ro said, tried to listen, and I figured if I kept going it might begin to make more sense. And if not, it was worth it to go just to escort her.

Worst case scenario, I’d spend an hour every week being her arm candy. It sure as hell beat staying at home without her.

After the service, I tried to charm as many people she spoke to as I could. Ro seemed to be friends with everyone, particularly every lady over seventy, and I caught on quick.

I invited several sweet old ladies over for dinner, flirting with and flattering them shamelessly. Not a one of them said no.

If the way to Ro’s heart was through adorable senior citizens, I’d adopt a football team’s worth of them. More.