Page 85

It's my last day off before shift change, and I dread leaving Violet alone the next two days. What I'll miss even more is not sleeping beside her at night. I've managed to keep my hands to myself—mostly—but whether we fall asleep together on the couch or snuggle up to cuddle in bed, I think we both sleep better in each other's arms.

I haven't pushed her for more details on her relationship with her ex. I know enough. I want to know more, but I want her to tell me when she's ready, not because I'm badgering her about it. I want her to trust me with details and the pain of whatever she endured. To feel so secure and safe that she can tell me. And then we'll deal with whatever happens next.

After breakfast, we head to Safe Harbor. I'm on a treadmill watching as Lawson instructs Vi on ways to escape a man intent on hurting her. It makes my blood pulse faster, just seeing Lawson pretending to come at Violet, but I can hear his instructions. The guy is a born teacher and patient when it takes her a bit to get the movements down.

After a while, Lawson calls for a break despite Violet's insistence she's okay to go on. He shakes his head and walks her to a bench, opening a cooler and handing her a bottle of water before settling in beside her.

Chopper lifts his head from where he snoozes to take a long look before lying right back down, but Havoc ambles over to my girl in what has quickly become a bonding thing between the two of them. I know dogs are instinctive creatures and good judges of character. I also know while friendly, Havoc doesn't take to just anyone. But he and Violet seem to have formed something special, and Havoc makes a point of moving to Violet's side during the breaks in training.

I watch as Violet tenderly scratches Havoc's ears, and the dog practically melts against her, eyes rolling back as though experiencing heaven. I shake my head at the sight and smile, knowing I'm no better than Havoc when Violet touches me.

All those sweet, lazy kisses we share before bed. The feel of her short nails in my hair or running over the scruff on my jaw. Violet is an innately sensual woman who was forced into a place of fear by a loser pretending to be a man. I hope eventually she'll emerge from that dark, safe cave and revel in all she is as a woman.

I leave the treadmill and move close enough to eavesdrop on their conversation while hitting the free weights.

"Like I said before, Havoc is a tool, but you always need a system in place. A safe word to use with someone who'll know you're in trouble. For example, if I told you to bring me Havoc's pink collar, you should know something's up. He doesn't have a freaking pink collar, so that's your cue. Do you and Sully have a safe word?"

I watch as she shakes her head and frowns. That's something I should've thought of before now, and I kick myself for not realizing it sooner.

"Set something up. With him and Jas, your parents. Anyone close to you. You may never have to use it in your life, but it's good to have."

Violet swallows but nods.

"Remember, the goal is to buy time and get away. Not fight. You're new to this. After a while, you'll be able to hold your own, but you're never going to be able to completely match a full-grown man who fights dirty. That means you have to fight dirtier when and where you can and get to safety."

She nods again.

"When you're in the moment, you can't freeze, Violet. You can't shut down. And when it comes to your ex… You have to fight the fear. Fight the memories. You do a good job when you're facing me, but when I'm behind you…"

"I know," she says, her face heating. "I can't help it."

"It's a block. But we can cut through the block. You trust me?"

This time it takes far longer for her to nod.

I see Lawson glance over at me and meet the man's gaze.

"Sully, come help us out."

I lower the barbells and roll off the bench, heading toward them warily. Violet isn't looking at me but at Havoc, like she wants to curl up against the dog and go to some place safe mentally. "You sure this is a good idea?" I ask in a low voice.

Lawson nods toward the training mat, and after a long look at my girl, I head that way, blatantly listening as he tells her to get into position.

Violet glances up at me warily before her gaze shifts away, and I find myself in that awkward in-between of wanting to help her train and not wanting to cause her a moment of pain, emotional or otherwise.

"Come up behind her. Grab her by the hair," Lawson says.

"Dude—"

"Do you want to help her? Fighting off a stranger is different than fighting someone you know. She knows her ex. Knows what he's capable of. Muscle memory will kick in if he gets his hands on her, and she can't freeze in the moment. Grab her by the hair. Pull her into a bear hug. Attack and let's see what she's got."

I plan to make sure Thad never gets his hands on her, but truthfully? I can't guarantee it. Which is why I inhale and lift my hand, sinking my fingers into her hair above her ponytail and gently but firmly yank her back against me.

Sure enough, I feel Violet stiffen, her breath seize in her lungs, and I see Lawson's gaze fill with concern that when she needs inner strength and courage, she's going to freeze up.

"You know what to do, Violet. Focus!"

She lifts her hands to my wrist, but her breathing is choppy and I know she's sliding into a panic attack. "Law⁠—"