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Asa huffed out a laugh. “To be continued, Lois. Go take a bath.”
“Are you sure you want to do this, baby?” Felix asked.
It was an echo of the words Zane had uttered just before the live a few hours ago. But that was Felix, always checking in. Always making sure Zane was okay. That he was cared for. That he wanted it, whatever it might be. And when it came to living with these three men, it really could be anything.
Like tonight.
He wanted to do it. He did. But there was this overwhelming sense of…something. He didn’t know how to explain it. He was trembling, slightly sweaty despite the chilly air circulating in the room. He could only liken it to a bomb ticking down in his stomach. Maybe that was too dramatic. There was this tension, this steel cord winding tighter and tighter inside him, ready to snap.
He was excited. Exhilarated. He was fucking terrified.
He gave a jerky nod, dry swallowing as he clutched at Felix’s hands. There was no way Felix couldn’t feel him shaking, but Zane still tried to reassure him, “Yeah, I’m sure. I just need you here with me.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” Felix promised.
It was bright in the sex attic, a glaring change to the usual dungeon-like atmosphere they’d worked so hard to achieve over the years. Most of the time they played, the lights were dimmed, rows of toys gleaming under an ominous red glow, like this was hell and Asa was the devil. His husband would prowl the room, moving from shadow to light, again and again, like an animal stalking its prey. All three of the men in his life liked to bat their food around before they ate it. And in this house, Zane was everyone’s favorite meal.
But tonight, the lights were stark white, like a surgical suite, bright enough to make Zane squint. Little dots danced before his eyes when Asa adjusted the lamp to point directly over Zane’s pelvis. Another shiver of fear lanced through him. He’d laid on the leather table beneath him hundreds of times, never realizing just how much it resembled an exam table until right then. His only comfort was his head sitting in the cradle of Felix’s open legs, long fingers combing through his hair.
Between the lights, his spread legs shackled at the ankle, and the leather strap holding his hips, he felt a little like those depictions of alien abductions. The ones in shows, people held hostage on spaceships and experimented on against their will.
He giggled at the thought, earning a concerned look from the other three. “Sorry, but is nobody else getting a Close Encounters vibe right now?”
A slow grin split Avi’s face. “Does that make us aliens in this scenario?”
“You are about to probe me, are you not?” Zane said, hating the way his voice shook.
“Yeah, we are,” Avi said, anticipation dripping from his words.
Avi glanced at the medical tray he held, then licked his lips. They had yet to let Zane see it. Did they think seeing the sounds would make him more nervous or less? Even he wasn’t sure. Beneath him, he could feel Felix’s leg bouncing, his nervous energy needing some kind of outlet as he monitored everything Asa did. His gaze followed him around the room like he was ensuring Asa didn’t fuck anything up.
Asa wouldn’t fuck up. He was in God mode, stripped of all pretense, easily dropping the mask he wore to appear more…human. His face was blank, expression unreadable as he went about making sure he followed every protocol needed to keep Zane safe. His heart skipped. He’d done so much research just to keep Zane safe.
Avi was the only one who appeared to share in his anticipation.
Hours had passed since the Q&A. Zane’s liquid courage had worn off, leaving behind nerves and this electric kind of excitement. Asa had insisted they all go into this one-hundred percent sober. He called it another safety precaution, but Zane suspected that Asa wasn’t sure they’d ever play like this again, and he wanted Zane to remember every moment.
Zane bit down on his bottom lip, squirming at the thought, earning a sharp glance from his husband.
“Wiggle all you want now, but once we start, you need to be still. Understand?”
It was on the tip of his tongue to remind Asa he was strapped to the table, but one dark look had him dropping his gaze. “Yes,” he managed quietly, nodding just in case Asa somehow hadn’t heard him.
His husband seemed satisfied with that, returning to his preparations, leaving Zane vibrating with the kind of anxious anticipation only Felix could soothe.
Almost like he could read Zane’s mind, Felix began to card his fingers through Zane’s hair. “You’re so pretty like this,” he crooned. “So good for us.”
Zane let his eyelids fall shut, taking a few deep, cleansing breaths before he opened them again. He dragged his gaze over his husband’s bare torso, watching the muscles ripple with every breath, every motion. He was so fucking hot, especially like this. Completely raw, more animal than human, fully prepared to clinically unravel Zane in every conceivable way.
Asa and Avi had lost their shirts and were moving around each other in a well-practiced dance they’d perfected over the years, making sure everything was just so. They had stripped Zane of his clothes the moment he’d entered the room, leaving him totally bare. Felix had remained dressed at Zane’s request. Being the only one naked made this whole thing more taboo, more forbidden. Just another part of the fantasy.
Zane’s breaths came faster as Asa slid on the black gloves, the sound of the nitrile snapping against his skin reverberating through Zane’s soul. He’d almost asked for the mask, the one that made Asa look like some kind of criminal, but Zane’s heart was lodged in his throat as it was.
“Asa—” he started, voice cracking.
“No,” Asa said, cutting him off. That one syllable landed like a slap. Sharp. Direct. The sting of it lingering. “No talking. Tonight, you’re our toy. And toys don’t talk. Unless I ask you a question, you lie there and take what I give you. If you’re not safewording, the only things leaving your mouth better be moans, whimpers, or screams. Understand?”
Zane’s response was a high whine that sounded more like fear than desire. He jolted as a slap landed on his outer thigh, temporarily stealing his breath, jerking his gaze back to his husband.