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“Zaney wants another baby,” Avi said frankly. “He wants a baby with Asa.”
Felix inhaled sharply. Zane closed his eyes.
Well. There went easing into it.
“That’s not true,” Zane gasped before Felix could speak. When Felix frowned, Zane stumbled over his words. “We-Well, it is true, but it doesn’t have to be my baby. I just want more babies. With Asa, with Felix…with any of you. They don’t have to be my DNA or anything. Hell, my DNA is probably poisonous anyway.”
“Poisonous?” Felix said, jaw clenching.
Zane knew his brows would be pinched if he hadn’t started having his face frozen with botox every six months or so.
“I think he means venomous,” Avi teased.
“What did Dad always say?” Asa asked. “Oh, right.”
“If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous. If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous,” the twins said in unison.
Zane glowered at them, but there was no heat behind it. They were just trying to lighten the room.
He stared down at the sheet gathered around his waist, wishing he could snatch the words back.
“You’re not toxic or venomous or poisonous,” Felix said, hugging him close. He pressed a kiss to Zane’s shoulder, lingering there like he could somehow make Zane believe him through sheer persistence.
“I’m all for a baby, Lois. But as much as I love the idea of knocking you up, some level of medical intervention would be necessary,” Asa said, arm tightening around his waist until some of Zane’s panic waned. His palm spread over Zane’s stomach, warm and possessive, anchoring him.
Just enough for his thoughts to get away from him. Again.
“I have a sister,” Zane blurted out.
His words were like a record scratch, the silence deafening.
It was like everything froze. Somewhere, Zane could hear a clock ticking, Felix’s breathing was loud in his ear. Even Asa’s thumb stopped its slow sweep over his skin. The stillness was suffocating. Zane’s heartbeat seemed impossibly loud in the silence, thudding against his ribs, like it was trying to escape before he could explain himself.
“What?” Felix managed, forcing the word out on a low breath.
Tears sprang to Zane’s eyes, but he wiped them away furiously. He hated that. Hated how quickly his body betrayed him, tears arriving before he’d even decided he was sad. Or scared. Or whatever the hell this was. “I-I didn’t want to say anything until I knew.”
“Knew that you have a sister?” Avi asked.
“Knew if they wanted anything to do with me. I did a DNA test on Ancestry. I figured maybe someone from my real father’s family might be there,” Zane said quietly. “I-It’s only been a couple of weeks. This isn’t some deep, dark secret I’ve been keeping from you for months. In a way, I’ve more been keeping it from myself. The closer I get to these…strangers, the scarier it will become.”
Because strangers couldn’t hurt him. Not really. But family could. Zane had a lifetime of evidence to prove it.
“Nobody’s mad at you, Zaney,” Avi said. “Right?”
There was an authority in his voice that rarely surfaced outside of playtime. He was telling them that they better not be mad. It was such an Avi thing to do—protect Zane from a threat that didn’t even exist yet. Zane met his gaze over Felix’s shoulder, smiling softly when Avi gave him a firm nod.
“Of course not,” Asa assured him.
There was an edge beneath the words anyway, but Zane knew it wasn’t directed at him. Asa was already preparing to hate people he hadn’t even met.
Felix nodded, too. “We’d never be mad at you for wanting to know your family.” His hand slid into Zane’s, their fingers threading together. Felix squeezed once, and some of the tightness in Zane’s chest loosened. After a moment, he added, “So, you’ve talked to this…sister?”
Zane shook his head. “No, not yet. I’ve talked to a cousin. My cousin. Her name is Reina.”
My cousin.
Two stupid little words, but something about saying them aloud made his throat tighten all over again. He had cousins. Apparently. He’d existed for decades without knowing there were people walking around in the world whose family tree connected to his.
