Page 107

In the end, I answered the truth, because my mother had not raised me to be a coward, and I could not lie to Tallu, not even when the truth was only going to cause him more pain.

“Before my soul went into the river, I was the One Dragon.”

Tallu drew back but didn’t accuse me of lying. His lips went tight, his expression frozen as he searched my face for any hint of a lie.

“Who told you that? The animalia?” There was an accusation in his words. He and I both knew that, like the imperials they hated, the animalia had the ability to lie and twist the truth for their own benefit.

I shook my head. “I was the one who told them. It is true.”

Tallu looked down at where our hands touched, and I couldn’t stand the expression on his face, so I turned my palm, lacing our fingers together.

“You don’t believe me,” I said, my stomach tightening, my fingers twitching against Tallu’s as I tried not to pull away.

Tallu’s smile was mirthless. “Of course I believe you. You are the man I love. You have owned my heart from the moment I laid eyes on you. But I am the great-grandson of the greedy king who killed you. I have your blood on my hands. The One Dragon’s heart—your heart—makes up the crown I wear. How can I possibly deserve you?”

“It is not that—” I tried to put into words the thoughts running through my head, the desperation I felt. “I was only able to remember who I was because of you.”

Tallu frowned at me. He opened his mouth once, then closed his lips, looking down at our hands, but not pulling his own away, even though he clearly wanted to. “What do you mean?”

“I have been born and reborn over and over again since Wollu killed me. But this is the first time I woke to my previous life. This is the first time my powers were accessible to me. And it is because of you.”

“Because I could not save you from Kacha. Either time. His violence caused you to wake.” Tallu’s bitterness ate at his words, and he pulled away his hand, fisting it on his knee. “I could not save you and so you were forced to regain powers that should have been lost with your previous life. I am not worthy of you, either as prince of the Northern Kingdom, or as the One Dragon.”

I put my fingers underneath his chin, raising it. “Is that what you truly believe?”

“What else am I to believe?” Tallu asked. “If you did not wake in any of your previous lives, then it must mean my failure was so great you felt you had to.”

I laughed, the sound splitting open the tension between us. He drew back, but I grabbed at his robes tightly, pulling him toward me, pressing our lips together. He sat still, unmoving, unresponsive to my attack, so I redoubled my efforts, kissing him over and over until he softened against me.

“You fool,” I said. “You fool. I woke, not because you were incompetent, but because you were worthy. I woke because it was only with your support that the power of the One Dragon could return to the world. You brought me back. Your work at destroying the Imperium is what allowed me space to come back into the world.” Tallu shook his head, but I leaned forward, insistent. “You do not even realize what you did.”

“What I did?” Tallu asked.

I sat back, pulling him with me, so that his body weighed mine down. “You helped me. And now when I tell you something that others would dismiss as madness, you do not accuse me of such.” His hips pressed mine into the couch, his body lax on top of mine. “Tallu, you believe me.”

He laughed against my hair, moving his lips from my temple to my cheekbone. “Your becoming the One Dragon is the least impossible thing about you. Your being an assassin who forgives me for my family’s part in the destruction of your nation—your loving me despite who I am, what I am? That is far more impossible to me. The fact that you are brilliant and have powers that no one else in the wide world does? I already knew that.”

I kissed him again, desperately groping at him, wanting to feel his skin against mine. I might contain the soul of the One Dragon, but I needed to prove that I was still Airón of the Silvereyes Clan, son of Queen Opûla, brother to Eonaî.

Tallu hesitated only briefly before giving in, resting his full weight against me, pinning me back into the world. In his arms I was still me.

I clawed at his robes, pushing them off his shoulders, and he reared back only far enough to strip down to his bare chest. I shivered and he sat back, pulling me on top of him, and I yanked off my own jacket and shirt, my fingers catching on the delicate embroidery, sliding off the silk fabric. Then he was kissing my neck, his lips tracing the line of my collarbone, his mouth on mine as he came back to me, desperately searching for something I was more than happy to give.

“I love you. No matter how impossible you are, I will love you until there is no breath left in my body,” Tallu said.

I laughed, giddy and finally able to release the tension I had felt since I came into my powers and realized that having the soul of the One Dragon was as much curse as it was blessing. I kissed him again, and his fingers traced up my sides, just soft enough to tickle before he gripped me tightly and pulled me down, our hips rolling together.

There wasn’t enough contact. I needed more.

“Take me. Tallu, I need you to take me.” I growled the words, feeling them deep in my bones. I needed him, more than I had ever needed anyone, more than I had ever needed air to breathe or water to drink. If I was losing myself to the role of the One Dragon, if I was going to become something greater than myself, I needed him.

As though he could read the spiral of my thoughts, Tallu brought up his hands, framing my face and pressing kisses to my jaw, eyes, and forehead. He sat up, coaxing me to wrap my legs around his waist and then he lifted me, carrying me to the bed. I expected him to throw me down on top of it, but instead, he lowered me slowly, gently.

My back hit the soft blanket, and he bent low, kissing my mouth, pushing his hips against mine as we ground together. I could feel his hardness and wanted it. Greedily, I wanted all of him.

Tallu pulled back, just enough to slide off his pants and undergarments, to kick them across the floor. Then he kissed my neck again, his mouth moving meticulously across my skin as though he were mapping my flesh, turning me from a rational person into an impossibly sensitive, desperately craving creature.

Under his attentions, I was no man, no dragon, no animalia, I was simply his lover, yearning for his touch.