Page 25
I nod, relieved, but still concerned. Lucy Bishop has three husbands—Vale Wickford, Cage Blackwell, and my uncle… Atreus Graves. He’s the one she dotes on the most. The one who helped her establish the town of Evigheden and the one who founded Nocturnus on one cold Yule night, decades ago. And they were also the reason my father chose to leave and start anew here in Raven’s Gate with my mother. But Atreus still has his hooks in this family…
“Mother, may I offer another option? If Silas refuses, of course.” The only thing that matters to me is protecting our bloodline. Bell’s admonition has repeated in my head since he proclaimed it a few nights ago.
She raises an eyebrow. Perhaps seeing me as a grown woman for the first time. “You may.”
I must be careful with my words. “Finn is much too young and reckless to lead Nocturnus. You already know that. And I am… a woman. So I am not allowed. But I am the middle child. The one technically in line after Silas. If I were a man, you’d be preparing me right now to take over. And with all due respect… I should not be robbed of that.”
My mother’s breath hitches. “What are you suggesting, Arkana?”
I take a deep breath. The oleander must really be working, for I am the bravest I’ve ever been with this woman. “I think it’s only fair that the honor of elder should, by proxy to me, go to my husband. Bellamy Erebus should lead Nocturnus.”
The energy in the drawing room crackles with unfamiliar tension. A strange hush falls over us, kissing our skin, while the ravens release a cacophony of cries on the terrace outside.
Even the housemaid whimpers.
I hold my breath in an attempt to remain as still as possible while Priscilla Graves gawks at me like I have two heads.
“But he is not a Graves. That would be blasphemy,” she whispers as if the walls are capable of spilling our secrets. Perhaps they are. The ravens most definitely do. Despite how we worship them, they allow us the illusion of control when, in fact, it is they who rule us.
“I will find Silas, Mother. And I will beg him with everything I have to return and take his rightful place. But if he denies us… Nocturnus should be in the hands of the man who is married to the eldest daughter. Not in the hands of a boy who picks the wings off flies for sport.”
Her nostrils flare. “I appreciate you helping me with Silas. But what you propose is blasphemy. Atreus could ostracize you for even suggesting it. Do not repeat this ever again.”
My heart sinks. I’d hoped that I could appeal to her with logic and reason. But as strong as she is, she still bows to the mercy of weak men. I lower my head. “Forgive me, Mother. I fear my bodice is too tight today.”
She releases a sigh of relief. “Yes, that has happened to me on many occasions. Once you’re with child, you’ll enjoy the looseness of the maternal gowns much more.”
I force a smile and take another sip of my poison-spiked tea. I realize my mother has been stifling us with this stuff since birth. It is her way of controlling the narrative. Sedating us with oleander, awakening us with hemlock, inciting us with nightshade… the list goes on and on. It is only since I’ve been away from this estate and her influence that I’ve begun to see clearly for the first time.
We sip our tea in silence and polite awkwardness until I feel as if an acceptable amount of time has passed. And now it has.
“I’ll send word once I’ve spoken to Silas.” The housemaid helps me with my coat as I linger in the drawing room archway.
“Where do you think you’ll start your search?”
I bite my lip to mask my annoyance. “I don’t need to search. I know exactly where he is, Mother… It’s where he always is.”
She folds her arms and hisses. “And where is that, my clever daughter?”
I smile, which stokes her ire further. “It’s wherever Jessamine is. And as of this fall, she resides at the Nest.”
My mother’s eyes widen. “I assumed she’d be returning back to Evigheden with her family for the winter.” Ever since the Blackwells distanced themselves from Nocturnus, the rest of the families have kept their distance from them. All but Lucy’s third husband, Cage Blackwell, of course. So the last woman my mother wants her firstborn son marrying is Jessamine.
“Well, you underestimated her love for Silas. And his for her. She’s enrolled at Tenebrose Academy as a boarder. It was the only way her father would let her remain in Raven’s Gate.” I chuckle as I bask in my mother’s shock. For once, she’s the one who’s been blindsided.
I don’t bother hanging anything up or waiting for servants to tend to me. I can’t breathe. Every stitch of this needs removing. Now. I pull off my boots first and toss them behind me as I stalk across the marble floors of the manor.
I drop my hooded velvet cloak next. “I will welcome an early death before I live like this a second more,” I cry out.
My skin prickles as droplets of sweat gather on the small of my back. I fumble with the ribbons of my bodice, grunting as I pull at them. “I cannot endure this!”
Delia rushes to me. “Let us go to your bedchambers so I may help you, my lady. Please.”
I shrug her off. “I need to be free this instant.”
“It is indecent,” she whispers.
“I don’t care!” I yell. “This is my manor, and I will run naked through it if I wish.” I retrieve a dagger from my skirt and slice through the ribbons of my corset. The second they unravel, my entire body tingles. I let out a satisfied moan as I rip it away from my body and fling it.
