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Kathy freezes halfway through cutting another piece. Briony gives me a wee nudge under the table.
Ah, right. Better mind my p’s and q’s. I genuinely didn’t think “shit” was a problem to say in a room of adults, but there we go. And isn’t Kathy a lecturer in English literature? I bet she’s read some books with proper filthy words in them.
“Sorry. What I meant is, he’s bad news.”
Neil pinches a wee bit of cheese off the top of his lasagne and lowers it below the edge of the table.
“How come your da gets away wi’ feeding Penny from his plate?” I ask Briony. “When I tried that the other day, you slapped my hand.”
“Because my dad is a lost cause,” Briony says. “Doesn’t matter how many times I ask him not to, he always does it. You, though? I might still be able to train you.”
Innes is quick to change the topic back to MMA, which is fine by me. I could talk about MMA all day, but it seems the same isn’t true for everyone at the table.
“What is it your parents do, Ryan?” Kathy says suddenly and without any preamble.
Briony stiffens, but the question doesn’t bother me. It’s fair. Kathy doesn’t know my situation, and the only way she’s going to find out is by asking.
“I never knew my da,” I say. “And I’m no really in contact wi’ my maw.”
“I see.” Kathy dabs her mouth with her napkin. “Any brothers or sisters?”
“Naw.”
“Cousins? Aunts? Uncles?”
“Mum!” Briony says. “Enough.”
“It’s fine,” I say. “Naw, none I’m in touch wi’. But my coach, Davie, and his wife and daughter are family, or near enough. I moved in wi’ them for a while when I was sixteen, and it was Davie helped me find a place of my own.”
Briony turns to look at me. “I didn’t know that.”
“Aye, well.” I shrug. “As far as I’m concerned, Niamh is the sister I never had.”
“Niamh?” Innes says. “As in Niamh McGrath? The woman who armbarred her opponent in the first round at Braehead?”
“That’s the one.”
Innes whistles. “I wouldn’t mind having her as a sister. She’s brilliant. No offence, Briony.”
“Some offence taken,” Briony objects. “I’m a wonderful sister.”
I squeeze her knee under the table. “Anyway, talking of Niamh, I’m actually taking Briony to the gym next week. Niamh’s gonnae help me teach her some self-defence.”
“That’s good,” Neil says to Briony. “No harm in knowing how to look after yourself, especially after what happened the other week with that lad on the scooter. Did you ever hear any more from the police?”
“No,” Briony says. “I don’t think I will, to be honest.”
Neil shakes his head and mutters something about the state of the world these days.
“Well,” Kathy says, “I suppose if you’re going to learn, it makes sense to learn from someone who knows what he’s doing.”
Hang on. That almost sounded positive, and it was about me. I’m calling that a win.
“Can you film it?” Innes asks me. “Briony doing self-defence is something I have to see.”
“Hey!” Briony says.
“What? I’ll be supportive. I’ll only laugh a little, I promise.” Then, to me: “Actually, Ryan, can I ask you something?”
