AllFreeNovel Stories worth discovering

The Flesh That Binds Us

Page 87

by Love J. Brystowe

“Thank you,” I murmured, tapping my finger absently against the wooden arm of the chair in rhythm with the steady beep of the heart monitor, trying to ignore the weight of his stare.

Things between us were still awkward. The last time I’d seen Peter was six months after Evie disappeared. Back then, grief had hollowed both of us out in different ways. He’d thrown himself into finding her with a kind of desperation that bordered on self-destruction, and I’d become the easiest target for it. Every conversation had turned into another argument, another accusation hidden inside concern, another reminder that I hadn’t protected her.

I knew he was hurting too. God, I knew that. Evie was his little sister. But I’d been drowning beside him, and eventually, I couldn’t keep standing there while he aimed all that rage at me like I wasn’t already carrying enough of my own.

Now here we were again, sitting in a hospital room that smelled like antiseptic and lavender, with seven years of guilt and grief wedged silently between us. But despite everything, Peter had been here every day. He made sure I ate, even when I said I wasn’t hungry. He’d brought pillows and a blanket from home, because apparently the hospital ones “looked miserable.”

He reminded me to take my medication when the nurses were late, and half the time, I’d wake up and find a fresh bottle of water sitting beside me without ever seeing him put it there. So maybe I was the only one feeling uncomfortable, but it was hard to reconcile our differences when so much time had passed.

“Look, for what it’s worth…” Peter cleared his throat roughly, sliding his hand across the bed to fiddle absentmindedly with Evie’s fingers. “I wanted to apologise for the way we left things all those years ago.” He let out a quiet breath and shook his head at himself. Talk about timing. “I just—fuck, Jackson, I didn’t know what to do.” His voice cracked slightly with exhaustion. “I didn’t have anyone besides Nicola and fucking Wayne of all people keeping me together, and instead of leaning on you, I pushed you away.”

“I was angry all the time,” he admitted. “At the police. At the media. At myself.” His jaw tightened. “At you, sometimes, because you were the reason she left that night, and I needed somewhere to put all of it.” I swallowed hard, but stayed silent. Peter rubbed a hand over his face before looking back at me. “And none of that was fair.” His eyes dropped briefly to Evie before lifting again. “I should’ve realised you lost her too.”

Something in my chest twisted painfully at that.

“I was a selfish idiot,” he said with a weak huff of laughter. “And seeing as you’re obviously still stupidly in love with my little sister after all this time…” A hesitant smile pulled at the corner of his mouth. “I’m guessing you’re not going anywhere anytime soon.”

Despite myself, I felt the ghost of a smile tug at my lips.

“So,” he continued carefully, softer now, “I’d like it if we could try to fix things. You know…like old times?” I looked back down at Evie’s hand in mine, tracing my thumb over the pale scar cutting across her palm.

“I’m sorry too,” I said quietly.

His brows pulled together immediately. “What are you sorry for?” he asked, genuinely confused.

“For leaving. I mean, I accept your apology, but I owe you one too. Because I should’ve stayed,” I admitted. “I should’ve kept looking like you did. Instead, I ran.” Shame burned hot in my chest even now. “I was scared, and I was heartbroken, and every second felt unbearable. So when things between us started falling apart…” I swallowed hard. “I let you push me away instead of standing there and telling you how much it was destroying me.”

Peter’s expression shifted, guilt flickering across his face, but I shook my head slightly. “We should’ve stuck together,” I said softly. “We always worked best as a team.” A sad sort of laugh escaped him at that, because it was true. Before everything happened, the three of us had been practically inseparable. Him, me, and Evie tangled through each other’s lives so tightly, it had felt permanent.

Until it wasn’t.

My eyes drifted to Evie lying between us, so still it barely felt real sometimes.

“Maybe then…” My throat tightened around the words. “Maybe we would’ve figured it out sooner.”

“We were kids, Jackson,” he said quietly. “We were grieving and exhausted and completely out of our depth.” Evie’s heart monitor beeped steadily in the silence that settled over the room at his words. Because that was the truth, wasn't it? We were two nineteen-year-olds trying to do the best we could with what we knew. No, it wasn't perfect, and yes we made mistakes. But…well, you can’t change the past.

I glanced up eventually and found Peter already looking at me, something distant and thoughtful in his expression. “Do you remember when Alexander Todd stole your scholastics book in year three?” he asked suddenly, the corner of his mouth lifting. “And we chased him around the oval until he gave it back?”

A surprised laugh escaped me softly. “Uh…yeah. I do.”

Peter huffed a quiet laugh of his own. “Or when I asked Valerie Noonan out in year six, but she rejected me because she had a crush on you?”

I winced instantly. “Jesus.”

“You were insufferable about that, by the way.”

“I was twelve.”

“You still brought it up for, like, three years.”

A reluctant smirk tugged at my mouth. “Yeah, alright.”

Peter lifted a fist to his mouth, trying and failing to suppress his laughter. “That’s how I remember us, Jackson,” he said after a moment, his voice quieter now. “Not the last times we saw each other, but the years we had before that. I don’t want to live in the past anymore,” he continued. “So I accept your apology, but I’d rather we move forward.”

Before I could respond, he pushed himself to his feet and started toward me. I met him halfway, shoving the chair back as we collided into a hug hard enough to knock the breath from both of us. Peter groaned dramatically against my ear from the impact, tightening his grip around me anyway, like my weakened strength was doing anything to him.

“You’re a bastard, you know that?” I teased as he pulled back, grinning like a complete idiot.