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I didn’t forget him, though. Not really. You can’t hate someone you don’t remember. And while I don’t have crystal-clear memories, some have come back. I think. Regardless, the feeling one associates with memories never went away. I knew him the moment I laid eyes on him. I knew there was a man out there who wormed so deep inside me that no one else could ever claim his territory.

“The lab is tucked away at the foot of the mountains just outside New Grove. If you ever want them, I can show you. A lot of Patryn’s research was hard to understand, but after learning you made a literal poison from your own blood, I’m willing to bet you’ll know what it all means. You were always so clever.”

I ignore the compliment.

“Patryn was your guardian, right?” I ask, trying and failing to remember the man.

Saren nods. “Yeah. He…well, he was the closest thing I had to a parent.” I spot the tremble in his chin and the forced shrug of his shoulders.

“Someone would…,” I hesitate to finish.

“Patryn would take you once a week. You never told me what he was doing or where you two went. But you never came back hurt. Sometimes you’d be more quiet than usual.”

I rub my temples, hissing when I brush over one of the burns on my cheek.

“We should rest,” Saren offers.

“We will. There’s a lake not far. Once we get washed up, we can crash for the night in the safe house.”

“Safe house?”

“They’re all over out here. Telex prefer their manufactured cities instead of the unknown of the wild, so it’ll be safe.”

I start moving again, but Saren is frozen in his spot. Glancing back over my shoulder, I wait for him to close his jaw.

“You called us Telex. Not leeches.”

The hope in his eyes makes my stomach flip. The fact that I made it happen does horrible things to my heart. What’s worse is I hate how much I love how pretty hope looks on him.

“Don’t get used to it,” I grumble.

32

Saren

Only now does it dawn on me that I’ve never actually seen a lake before.

Nestled in a valley of dark green canopies, sparkling under the afternoon light, is a body of water. It’s not crystal clear. In fact, it looks downright murky. Smooth rocks line its bank, catching tiny waves as they wash up onto land. An ancient wooden dock has long since rotted from the inside out. Skeletal, almost, but enough of it remains that I can picture what it might’ve looked like once upon a time.

Just as Ryx said, there’s a shack to the south. It doesn’t look very secure or warm, but it’s enclosed. Vines and shrubs have grown into the logs that make up its walls. And a brick chimney juts out of the rough roof. I find myself rooted in place, not wanting to disrupt the serene sight. There’s nothing out here. Maybe some animals and insects, but otherwise, it’s just us.

Ryx apparently doesn’t care to take in the scenery. He kicks off his boots and yanks off his cloak.

A squeak escapes my lips when he lifts the hem of his shirt, revealing a smooth, pale, corded back. He glances over his shoulder. Other than my own reflection, I’ve never seen a naked man before. Patryn always taught me to be modest. He wouldn’t ever come in until I was completely clothed. Even as a child, I had to bathe in my underwear. My cheeks heat at least ten degrees as my stomach somersaults.

“What?” Ryx demands, dropping his shirt back down.

“At least let me turn around first.”

A dark eyebrow hitches. “It’s just a body, Saren.”

I spin so he can’t see my face.

He chuckles under his breath, and then I hear the shuffle of fabric. A distinct plop sounds as the clothes hit the ground, followed by water splashing and a hiss. I don’t breathe—don’t move. There’s a foreign heat building in my core, and my palms are sweating.

“Hurry up and get in here,” he demands.

“I’ll just wait until you’re finished,” I croak, my throat unbelievably tight.