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“Well, if you’re going to set me up with dates, I’d appreciate it if you got to know the person a little bit better. I’m trying to help you find the man of your dreams. I don’t know what you’re trying to do. Are you trying to sabotage my dates so that I’ll say yes to a one-night stand with you?”

“Get over yourself, Brett, please.”

“I am over myself, but I’m going to be home in about ten minutes, and if you’re still there, we’re going to have to have a conversation.”

“Oh, I’m still here. I’m watching Love Is Blind: Netherlands and eating chocolate chip cookies and drinking milk. By the way, you don’t have hot chocolate. It would’ve been really cool if I could have had hot chocolate.”

“Then you need to buy hot chocolate for your own kitchen.”

“Ouch.”

“I’ll be back in ten minutes.”

I drive quickly to my home, and when I walk in, I see Rosie on the couch, legs up on the coffee table, munching on a cookie.

“Hey there, handsome.” She looks up at me with a lazy smile.

“Rosie, what is going on?”

“What do you mean, what is going on? I’m just relaxing. Do you want to decompress and tell me all about your date? I’m sorry that all she did was talk about yoga. I really didn’t know her that well. Marcus actually⁠—”

“Who is Marcus?” I cut her off, annoyed at the mention of this random man. Is she on the dating apps again?

“Oh, he’s this guy I met at the comedy show. He gave me his card.”

“He gave you his card for what?”

“I don’t know. To take me on a date? To have me take you on a date?”

“Wait, what? Who is this man, and why have I not heard about him before?”

“Why would you have heard about him?”

“Because I’m your dating coach.”

“You’re my dating coach for the purposes of this bet. I’m not going to tell you about every guy who’s interested in me.”

“So, he’s interested in you now?”

“Maybe. I don’t know. I haven’t called him yet.”

“Are you going to call him?”

“I don’t know.”

I sit down and lean back on the couch and scowl at her. I wrap my arm around her shoulders, and she looks over at me in surprise. Her pupils dilate and I watch as she swallows. I love the way she reacts when I’m close.

“Oh, okay. Is it like this then?” She takes another nibble of her cookie and chews slowly. She snuggles into me, and her warm body feels nice next to mine. Far too nice.

“Nope, wrong,” I say and shift back away from her.

“What?”

“On a first date, if a man puts his arm around you, you do not nuzzle into him. You shift away.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Just now, I put my arm around you and⁠—”