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“Sure, that sounds great.”
“Pizza good?”
“Only with anchovies.”
“Yuck.” He chuckled. “I have no idea how you like those, but I’ll do what we normally do and have them put the anchovies on your half.”
“Perfect. No rush, though. I don’t mind eating late. I’ll work up an appetite.”
“Thanks, babe. I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Okay. Have fun.”
It was after five PM, and despite what I’d told Calder on the phone, almost as soon as I hung up with him, I lost my mojo on the manuscript. My eyes were tired from staring at the laptop, so I closed it and went to do some laundry to at least make myself productive. Somehow I didn’t feel like it was okay to just rest. Maybe it was a form of self-punishment.
I piled the clothing from the hamper into a laundry bag. Swinging it over my shoulder, I walked out of the apartment and down the stairs. My heart raced as I passed Rafe’s door, but thankfully it was still closed.
When I got down to the laundry room, though, the sight of Rafe leaning against the washer sent what felt like an electric jolt through my body. Panic set in. He’s going to think I followed him. “I didn’t know you were here,” I stuttered. “I’ll just leave my bag for later.” I put the laundry on the ground. “I’ll go.”
I’d taken two steps out the door when his deep voice stopped me. “Wait.”
As I turned, I was expecting to see melancholy or even disdain in his eyes. But his expression was unexpectedly soft. I could barely look at his gorgeous face. My eyes fell to his big, veiny hands, and I had flashbacks of the many ways they’d touched me. When I looked up again, I could somehow feel his mouth on me. I shook my head.
He slipped his hands into his pockets. “Hi…”
“Hi.” I cleared my throat. “I truly didn’t mean to run into you. I hope you know that.”
“I know, Talia. I can tell by your nerves. I’m sorry I make you so damn nervous.”
“How do you expect me to feel after the way we left things?” I said, anger rising to the surface.
“I did what I had to do.”
My cheeks heated. “Which means completely shutting me out of your life. How have you been able to look after your aunt with your door closed all the time now?”
“I bought a freaking baby monitor. It actually works out a lot better.” He took a deep breath. “How have you been?”
“Things have been okay…” I lied.
His jaw tightened. “That’s not how Calder sees it.”
My eyes went wide. “What?”
“He called me the other day…just to talk.”
“He did?” Not sure why that surprised me. They were friends. Best friends. Best friends talk.
He nodded. “He told me all about how strangely you’ve been acting. The entire conversation, I wanted to poke my eyes out. I fucking hate lying to him.”
I blinked, looking down for a moment. It was stupid to think my boyfriend wouldn’t be worried that something was seriously off with me. “Did he seem suspicious?”
“You mean, does he think you’re fucking someone else? No.” He shook his head. “Does he think you fucked me? Certainly not.” He sighed. “He just thinks you’re not happy here in New York.” He tilted his head. “But of course, we know the truth about why you’re acting weird, don’t we?”
Pursing my lips, I nodded. “The guilt is killing me, Rafe. But at the same time—”
“What?” Rafe’s stare felt like it could melt the skin off my body.
I was afraid to let the words out.
