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Although the solution that had been on my mind the last twenty-four hours seemed so simple. Why couldn’t she have both? I could give her everything, couldn’t I? My love. A child. Her rightful inheritance.
A child.
Our child.
Kendall was in the shower. I heard the water turn off and looked at the clock. Twelve hours. I needed to decide. We needed to talk.
Tick-tock.
Tick-tock.
Tick-tock.
Twelve hours was basically the entire day before I had to be at the airport tonight for my flight to Venezuela. I didn’t care what we did today as long as we were together for every last second of it.
When Kendall emerged from the bathroom, I couldn’t help just staring at her with a smile on my face.
She squinted her eyes, “What?”
“Can’t I just look at you?”
She came around and straddled me. “I can’t believe you have to leave tonight.”
Suddenly, it felt like the load of unanswered questions I’d been harboring were starting to choke me.
My tone was abrupt. “What are your plans, Kendall? I need to know.”
She leaned her head on my shoulder and said, “I’m going home to Texas. I need some time away to really think. I owe Hans and Stephen a final answer.”
I pulled back to look her in the eyes. “Those are their names? The dudes in Germany?”
“Yes. I can’t string them along much longer.”
Nodding to myself for a bit, I said, “I think that’s a good idea then. Take some time to think things over. As much as I love being around you, neither one of us can think straight around each other.”
“I need to go online and get a ticket. I’m gonna try to get onto something that leaves out of Miami so we can depart from the same airport around the same time.”
Slapping her ass playfully, I said. “Why don’t you do that, get it over with. I was thinking we’d stay home, but after you’re done, maybe we should hit the beach, get some sun and fresh air, just chill there for the rest of the day until we have to get ready.”
A half-hour later, Kendall and I headed to Deerfield Beach. Even though the water was calm and perfect, we both opted to just lie down on the sand, taking in the sound of the ocean and the crystal clear blue sky.
As relaxing as the beach should have been, we were both still tense. At one point, we were lying on our stomachs, and she wouldn’t let go of my hand. Our faces were turned toward each other. When she finally flipped around, I followed suit and let go of her hand to place mine on her taut stomach. I rubbed my thumb along her perfect navel, and a surge of jealousy and possessiveness overtook me. The answer was becoming clearer to me.
I wanted her to belong to me and only me.
I didn’t want her to carry some other man’s baby. No fucking way.
I wanted her to carry my baby.
Not just because of some crazy inheritance shit, but because I wanted a baby with her—a future with her.
While having a baby right now wasn’t ideal, there was no doubt that I wanted it. So, given the urgent situation, why wait?
Lucy.
That was all I could think of. It was the fear of hurting Kendall, like I’d hurt Lucy. It lingered like a black cloud over me—that fear of letting Kendall down. It was ever present, but damn it, it wasn’t strong enough to overshadow my need for her—my love for her.
This situation was all or nothing.
