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Chapter Twenty-two

Keaton

Despite leaving space for him on the mattress the previous night, August hadn’t come upstairs. I’d stayed awake for an hour, oscillating between the urge to ask who the fuck he thought he was to assume I’d deviate from the only plan I’d clung to for months, to wanting to apologize.

Eventually exhaustion dragged me into a restless sleep, my subconscious replaying everything I wanted to avoid: the family I no longer had; the way my sister must have suffered; the near miss with the biter only days ago; Oz’s trap; his grotesque gallery; his intention to cut August’s tongue out; August’s lies. All of it circled again and again while I tossed and turned.

The worst part was knowing I would have slept better with August next to me. It was amazing how quickly a person could become accustomed to someone else’s warmth, the rhythm of their breathing, the brush of skin. None of it was about sex—just presence.

Sunlight pouring through the curtain-less window had me lurching from sleep to alertness in seconds. I sat up and listened. The house was silent enough to make me wonder if August had left. Could I blame him if he had? He’d offered me a future last night, something I knew didn’t come easily to him, and I’d thrown it back in his face.

If I were August, I wouldn’t have stuck around. Especially when I needed him—or at least his bike, which sounded dreadful—more than he needed me.

He had a home. He had transport. He had ways to make money, dishonest as they might be. He had a family. I had none of that. I just had him, and a need for vengeance so hot it blinded me to everything else.

That thought carried me downstairs, relief flooding through me when I found August tinkering with the bike. August grunted and didn’t make eye contact when I greeted him. “I hope you slept better than I did.” My attempt at offering an olive branch met with more silence.

The only relationship I’d ever observed closely was my parents’, and I couldn’t recall them ever arguing. Which left me clueless about how to make things go back to how they were.

A breakfast of fresh meat, hard boiled eggs, and fruit commenced in silence. If not for August passing me food, I might have believed he’d forgotten I existed, the floor apparently more interesting than my face.

After five minutes of being invisible, I couldn’t take any more, grabbing August’s arm and spinning him toward me. I ignored the look that said he was seconds away from reaching for his knife. “I get it,” I said quickly. “I fucked up.”

“Do you get it?” His quiet calmness somehow made it worse.

“Yes. I was a bastard last night. I deserve the silent treatment. You offered me…” I stalled, the right words not coming to mind.

“I offered you myself,” August said matter-of-factly. He tugged his arm free. “It’s fine. We made no promises to each other besides my getting you where you need to go. I’ll do that, then you can―”

“No.” I backed off a few steps, dragging a hand through my hair while I attempted to make my brain work properly.

“Every night since I came home to find my parents gone, since I learned what happened to my sister, I’ve thought of nothing but looking that bastard in the face while I put a knife in his gut. You see, I don’t want him to die fast. A crossbow bolt between the eyes is too quick. Too merciful. It’s the first thing I think of when I wake, and the last thing before I sleep.”

August studied me, silent but watchful. “And you were right about me treating this like a suicide mission, because I didn’t care about anything else. That’s why I broke into your room. That’s why I tied you up when you tried to cheat me.”

“It’s why you came back and rescued me,” August said, nodding toward the bike.

I studied the bike for a few seconds before returning my gaze to August. “No. I came back because it was the right thing to do. I claimed it was about the bike to save face, but it wasn’t. Not primarily, anyway.”

August laughed. “Doing the right thing isn’t something I’m familiar with.”

“That’s crap. You did it when you saved me from the biter about to take a chunk out of my neck. Even when you had every reason not to because you knew your lies would be exposed.”

August rolled his eyes. “I saved you. You saved me. Is there a point to this conversation beyond raking up the past?”

“The point is what you offered me last night… I want that. I really do.”

I stepped in close, August looking amused when I crowded him against the wall. He could have easily moved me aside to regain his freedom, but he chose not to. This close, his warmth scrambled my brain, words tangling just when I needed them the most. All I managed was, “You’re the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“Thing?” August laughed. “Wow! Thank you. I guess I should be glad the world’s a shithole and you haven’t stumbled across any beautifully carved tables or chairs to replace me.”

“Person… Man. Jesus, you know what I meant. It was a compliment.” I attempted to do better. “I’d be glad to be with you.”

“Even though I’m a conman?”

I thought about it. I couldn’t claim I had no issues with the way he chose to use his intelligence. And I only knew of the one con, the one I’d fallen hook, line, and sinker for. But now that I understood his motives, it was different. “Even though you’re a conman.” His eyebrow arched, surprise showing on his face. “But it has to be after. Everything has to be after. I’ve lived with this for too long to even consider giving it up.” Inspiration hit. “Imagine it was your grandma. Imagine someone tricked her and it resulted in her death.”

August tilted his head to consider it. “Hard to imagine. Usually she’s the one doing the persuading. But…” he cut me off before I could comment, “if anyone hurt her, I’d hunt them to the ends of the earth. Beyond, if I had to. I wouldn’t rest until they were food for the biters.”