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“It’s none of your business what I do, Rob. Go home,” he grits out through a clenched jaw.

I cross my arms and watch him as he steps onto the bus. There’s a pain in my chest that feels foreign. I want to claw it out of me and be rid of it, but the thought of never seeing Noah again fills me with the same fear I felt when I thought I was going to lose Theo.

It’s too late.

I care too much.

I’m going to have to let him go and hope that he’ll come back eventually. But I don’t think he will. Richard’s been living here for ten years, and Noah hasn’t once come to see him. The chances of Noah coming back for Bailey might be better. The chances of him coming back for me? Zero. I have a sinking feeling once that bus disappears around the corner, Noah will try his hardest to fade away.

By the time I force my frozen body to move, the bus doors have closed and it’s pulling back onto the main road.

ROBBIE

Friday 5th June

Me

I’m guessing you got home alright?

seen

Saturday 19th June

Me

You stole my favourite hoodie by the way. Feel free to bring it back to me whenever you want.

Like next weekend :)

seen

Sunday 20th June

Me

If you do come up next weekend, DO NOT stay with Theo and Bailey. I let myself in the other day and they were baking naked in the kitchen.

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to look at cake batter the same way again.

From where I was standing it looked like Theo was spreading it on Bailey’s … You know.

seen

Wednesday 1st July

Me

My bed feels far too big without you taking up all the room. I think I almost miss you kicking me all night too.

seen

Friday 17th July

Me

Caught a lobster that reminded me of you today.

It was a violent little bugger, the same shade of black as your hair. Too small to be caught, so I was about to throw it back in the sea when it got my finger good.