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My heart swells, a sudden, dangerous warmth spreading through my veins. For a split second, hearing her pitch ideas and use words like we, makes her feel like a true partner in this. Not just at securing the success of the vineyard, but a partner in my life.

Stop it, Sam, I remind myself, putting my guard back up. It’s all a lie.

Even if she loves this place as much as I do, she’s only here because of an allegiance to Pop. If I haven’t managed to get things turned around in a year’s time, then she’ll walk away to her real life. I have to remind myself to be grateful for any contribution she offers. Especially the massive sacrifice of being married to me for this year, without letting my heart create a future that doesn’t exist.

“Thanks, Lex.” I offer her a genuine smile. “That means a lot. I’ll take all the help I can get.”

“Go catch Jason.” She nudges my shoulder gently. “You’ve got this.”

I step out into the cool night air and climb into my truck. As I pull down the long, winding driveway toward the main road heading into Hanover, my headlights cut through the darkness. About a quarter mile past the estate gates, I notice a dark figure walking slowly along the shoulder of the road. I slow down slightly, my eyes narrowing as I take in the sight. They’re wearing a dark, oversized hoodie pulled up over their head, carrying a black backpack slung over one shoulder.

Hanover has a growing homeless population, just like many neighboring towns, and a lot of them are veterans who’ve fallen through the cracks. I watch the shadowed figure in my rearview mirror as I drive past, finding it a bit odd for someone to be walking this far out on a dark country road at night. But with my mind heavy with debt and my mother’s threats, I step back on the gas, heading into town. I hope like hell that Jason will come through for me tonight.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Lexi

Before leaving town for my weekend getaway with my Swiftie book club, I stopped by Grandpa’s house to ask if he’d consider allowing a nurse to visit a few days a week. Needless to say, that didn’t go over well. The stubborn old coot.

While I was there, I noticed he had a pretty bad cough. When I told him I was putting off my trip, he wouldn’t hear of it. Luckily, Bunny agreed to stop by and check on him while I was gone. But I’m struggling with leaving.

It’s only two days. And I know Bunny will call if she senses he isn’t doing well. I can be back here in four hours if push came to shove. But I hate leaving him when he’s sick. He’s the only family I have left.

Well, if you don’t count my husband.

Sam didn’t appear bothered by my leaving for the weekend. Heck, he’s probably excited to have the house, and the bed, to himself again. I’m not sure why this bothers me. I believe when he professed he was trying to better himself, it was genuine. It would go a long way to have bygones be bygones. Forgiveness for his past behavior would ease his conscience. And I want to forgive him, but I’m simply not there yet.

I don’t understand what happened to cause him to turn on me the way he did. And I’m not sure I’m ready to hear it yet. Maybe by the end of this marriage contract, he can be open and honest about the past. Because I didn’t do anything to warrant his behavior. And I have enough self-respect to expect better of the people in my life. So he doesn’t get a free pass simply because I love his grandfather enough to help save the winery.

I drove the majority of the trip to Hurricane, North Carolina, in silence. Every time I tried to turn on the radio, a song would play that caused me to think of him. I need to clear my head. It’s a shame you can’t meditate and drive at the same time.

“Finally,” I utter as I see the highway sign for Hurricane greet me ahead. Focus on spending time with your friends, Alexis. You thrive off of their energy. It will be the exact medicine you need.

Every single time I visit, I’m completely mystified by how Claire does it all. She manages a working horse ranch, keeps up with endless farm chores, and raises her sweet four-year-old boy, Huxley, entirely on her own. And what’s more, she handles it seamlessly. It leaves me in absolute awe. Watching her wrangle Hux into his rain boots while effortlessly talking down an equipment supplier on one of our trips made me realize how grounded and resilient she truly is.

I wish I felt half as tough as her right now.

Instead, I’m sitting on a plush patio sofa, surrounded by my six closest friends, each of them holding a cocktail and staring at me with laser-focused curiosity.

“Okay, Lexi,” Georgia teases, leaning forward and wriggling her eyebrows. “Enough about life at the clinic. We need the real dirt. How is it being married to your hot as hell husband? More importantly, how are you handling the long days at work on no sleep?”

A chorus of giggles and eager hums erupts around the circle.

“Spill.” Lilly laughs, nudging my knee with her foot. “Is he as wild as he looks, or what?”

“Yes, Lex. The man looks like he was carved out of granite. If I had a guy like that, I’d be dropping to my knees every time he flashed that dimple in my direction,” Claire adds.

Georgia’s face turns crimson. “Claire!”

“Well. I would.”

My mind goes into an instant tailspin. I force a phony smile to my lips, frantically searching my memory to conjure up the image of someone living out a passionate, healthy, active sex life with her handsome new husband. I think of the times I’ve lain beside Sam in the dark, listening to the steady rhythm of his breathing while my heart pounded so hard I was afraid it would wake him. I recall watching him step out of the bathroom fresh from a shower, a towel low on his waist, water dripping down the hard, chiseled contours of his chest. I replay the electric, breathless heat of our kisses on our wedding day. The way his rough hands cupped my face and held me as if I was the only person in the room.

I try to channel those moments, to package them into a playful, lighthearted answer that will satisfy their curiosity. But as I open my mouth, the lie strangles the words in my throat. My hands begin to tremble against my wineglass. The bright, teasing smiles on my friends’ faces slowly fade as they read the sudden, painful shift in my eyes.

“Lexi?” Georgia asks, her teasing tone instantly turning to concern. “What’s wrong?”

I quickly look away, staring out into a star-filled sky, but it’s too late. A single tear slips down my cheek, followed immediately by another.