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“Wait. You were there?”
“Uh, yeah,” I admit, realizing now it probably sounds like I’m a fricken creeper bringing up a game she didn’t know I’d attended. It was the only time I showed up where I shouldn’t have been. I didn’t sit in the student section, so no one recognized me. “I had to know how it would end.”
“Well, it ended, that’s for sure. I wish you’d said something to me.”
“I thought it would be awkward, you know, with Rachel.” And Evan, I don’t say.
“Yeah, maybe.” Emma doesn’t sound like she agrees with my logic. “It’s just been a while since I’ve seen you.”
A smile relaxes across my face. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who’s felt the distance. We may talk regularly each night, but it’s like we’re trapped outside of time, in a space where the rest of the world’s asleep and we’re the only ones who exist. Never considered she might actually miss having me around.
“Maybe we should do something about that.”
“Maybe.”
I note a smile in her voice.
“We should hang out sometime. Just… do something.” It’s a dare. A challenge to see if she’s willing to take a chance. To see how adventurous she is. I know she’s not Sadie, and the fact that I keep comparing the two disturbs me. But I want to understand Emma.
“Oh, yeah, something sounds fun,” she replies sarcastically. “I do that a lot, and I always have a blast.”
“You’re hilarious. But really, I’ll pick a day, and you’ll just have to come along to do whatever something I choose.”
“Bring it,” she says with bravado, making me laugh. She’ll soon find out I don’t back down from a dare.
There’s a knock on my door. I can’t get up, buried in Christmas ornaments. I’ve decided to surprise Jonathan and bring all of my handmade ornaments back to our place. We can have our own tree. Our very first tree.
“Come in!” I holler.
Magda sticks her head in. “What on earth are you doing?”
“Organizing,” I say proudly. I wave my hand around each pile. “These are my natural ornaments. These are my school ornaments. These are my friend ornaments.”
“Darling, that isn’t organizing. Putting them in boxes is what you need to be doing.”
I sulk, much preferring my method that also includes replaying the memories that go along with the ornaments. Some Christmases have their own soundtrack, so music helps the organizing.
“There’s someone here for you,” Magda tells me, detangling me from the garland that I’m wearing like a boa and removing the Santa and reindeer clothespins from my hair.
“Who?”
“Jonathan’s mother.” Magda gives me a serious look. Which only puts me on edge. “She’s in the front sitting room. I served her tea, but she seems concerned.”
I swipe the rest of the ornaments from my lap and rush from the room.
“Not that kind of concerned,” Magda assures me, staying in my room, probably to finish what I started eight hours ago.
“Hi Mrs.… Samantha,” I say cheerily, scraping tinsel off my tongue. “Sorry. Just going through some ornaments.”
It suddenly occurs to me that she’s supposed to be with Ryan at his basketball game. If she’s here, that means Hal’s there. And so is Jonathan. Hal stopped coaching Ryan this year, now that he’s in high school, but it doesn’t mean he’s not at the game.
The panic is written all over my face because she puts me at ease with, “Hal’s out of town on business. Jonathan is driving Ryan to Collin’s after his game. Something about video games.”
I exhale, and my entire posture shrinks by two inches.
“That’s actually why I’m here.”
Samantha’s seated on the love seat. I like to consider it the interrogation seat since that’s usually where Gavin or I sit when my parents need to talk with us. So it feels strange sitting in the chair across from her. I consider sitting next to her, but that would be beyond awkward.
