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“I do.” I forgot them in my truck last night, and they’re still hanging in the back seat of my cab. Did she see them?

“Stay. Leave from here.” She’s already crawling under the covers, ready to fall back to sleep. Except I can’t. Emma’s scream was an adrenaline injection straight into my heart. But I also know it’s stupid to drive home only to get up in a few hours. I’m closer to work here anyway. I’ll just get up before everyone and take off.

I ease Rachel’s door closed and walk down the steps closest to the spindles, where they’re less likely to creak. This house makes so many noises; I don’t think anyone would notice a few creaky steps. But I really don’t want Emma to hear me. To know I’m staying the night. It’s not like that.

I get my gym bag and one of the suits I picked up from the tailor out of my truck. I change into shorts and a T-shirt and set my alarm for five-thirty.

Showered. Dressed. I almost make it without being seen. It may have been the coffee that woke Emma. I can’t be certain. Or maybe she never fell back to sleep after her nightmare. That happens to me a lot, so I get it. But I nearly spill the travel mug of coffee on my newly pressed shirt when I see her standing at the top of the stairs, looking… amused at the sight of me. Not the expression I was expecting.

I’m definitely not amused. I feel like I just got caught sneaking in after curfew. Not by my father, of course.

“Sorry,” she says, her face reddening like she also thought she could get away with not being seen.

I hold a finger to my mouth. Last thing I want is for Rachel to wake up. “She’s still sleeping.” Emma nods in understanding. “Did I wake you?”

“No,” she replies, confirming my suspicions. Functioning on broken sleep is not ideal. I have no idea how I get through most days. Probably caffeine and adrenaline.

I retrieve my jacket from the closet and slide my computer bag over my shoulder. I surprised myself and got some work done when I couldn’t sleep last night. I raise my hand to Emma before slipping out the door, closing it as quietly as I can.

That cannot happen again.

So, I’m not moving on,” I say after recounting my terrible night with Devin. It was supposed to be our first date after talking and texting since we met on New Year’s.

“Why?” Collin asks casually, peeling pepperoni off his pizza and dropping it into his open mouth.

“He has kids! He used to be married!” I yell emphatically as I pace back and forth in Collin’s basement. “I’m not ready.”

“And?”

I spin around and stare at Collin. “There’s no moving on with a guy who’s divorced with two kids.”

“Doesn’t matter who he is. You’re not ready.” Finally, a voice of reason sitting on the couch across from Collin.

“Exactly!”

“Exactly what?” Collin asks, stuffing the pizza slice into his mouth. It doesn’t stop him from talking with his mouth full. “I’m missing something. I can usually decipher your cryptic freak-outs. But this one’s got me spinning. Help me out here.”

“I think she’s upset because he didn’t mention his ex or his kids. And she only found out because she ran into them mid-pickup on their first date. Have you not been listening?”

I shake my hands at Kendrick in gratitude. He gets it. Another addition to our lives since the beginning of the year, Kendrick is the drummer for the band that played that night at Devin’s penthouse.

Collin brought him into our friends circle. And I’m so glad he did, especially in situations like this. He’s a brilliant translator of all things male. I wish he were in our lives last year. I could’ve used his insight.

Kendrick holds his pint in the air. “I got you, girl.”

“You got that?” Collin asks, brows perked. “I’m impressed.”

“Three sisters and raised by my grandma,” Kendrick explains.

“You call her Grandma? That’s so adorable,” I swoon. “Collin, you can’t say something stupid and drive him away. I like him.”

“Great. So do I. And Grandma is the best. So,” he redirects his attention to me, “what happened?”

“I cancelled our date,” I say at the same time Kendrick says, “She dumped his ass.”

“Why?” Collin is so clueless. I want to shake him. It doesn’t usually take him this long to understand. I think having Kendrick over, sitting where Jonathan usually does, may be freaking him out a bit.

“Because I’m still in love with Jonathan. I will always be in love with Jonathan. And I don’t want to move on.” There’s a wave of relief saying it out loud. Along with a deep pain that makes me want to keel over and curl up in a fetal position for an eternity.