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She looked as tired as she had the night before, and Mabel felt a stab of sympathy.

“You couldn’t sleep?”

“Honestly? Not much. Isn’t that ridiculous? I was so tired I should have crashed out, but it didn’t work that way.” Brooke slumped a little on the sofa, nursing the mug in her hands. “My mind was too busy. You know how it is.”

She did know. There were times when her mind felt like a fairground ride—up and down and round and round. Getting it to stop was a challenge she had yet to master.

“You had a stressful day, both physically and emotionally.”

“Which was my own fault.” Brooke put the mug down. “I’m annoyed with myself. I keep going back over it, wishing I’d made a different decision. I was the one who insisted we kept driving. I don’t see my parents that often, you see. It takes a great deal of planning to get here. I’m an only child. I moved to London when I married Matt, and that’s been hard for my parents. Not arriving when I was supposed to is a bit of a killer blow for them.” She flushed and gave a little shake of her head. “Sorry. Too much information. I probably shouldn’t be talking about this anyway.”

Mabel’s heart nudged her ribcage. This was you.

She wanted to run from the conversation, but her legs wouldn’t move. “You feel torn.”

“Yes.” Brooke nodded. “Given the distance, it’s almost impossible to please everyone.”

“Have you tried telling your parents how you feel?”

“No. I don’t want to hurt them. And they don’t understand. From their point of view, they only see me a couple of times a year so it’s understandable that this visit is important.”

“But you didn’t cancel the visit. None of this was your choice.”

“I know. But I still feel responsible.” She was fiddling with the edge of the blanket, her fingers playing and twisting. “It might be easier if my mother had said, It’s the weather, Brooke. It’s not your fault. But I came away from the conversation feeling as if not being able to make it was somehow my personal failure. And also Matt’s personal failure. They resent him, because they think he took me away from them, instead of understanding that it was my choice. They take out their feelings on him, I suppose.”

Mabel went cold and then hot.

She wasn’t sure whether to keep quiet or speak.

And then she thought about what she knew, and what she’d learned. She thought about the damage.

“They want someone to blame,” she said. “They don’t understand what you’re feeling because they’re thinking about themselves, not you. They’ve probably spent the last few months planning for this moment.”

“They have. They’ve shopped. They’ve cooked. My mother has knitted sweaters for the girls.” Brooke gave a tired smile. “It will have been their lives for the past few months. That’s why I feel so terrible.”

Mabel’s skin prickled.

It felt as if someone was trying to say, Look! Look at your past. Look at the consequences of your actions.

“They’re thinking of their own disappointment,” Mabel said, “and about how excited they were to see you and how much they miss you. And because Christmas isn’t going to happen, they’re wondering when they’re going to see you next, and they’re wishing you lived closer so that they could be more entwined in your life. They’re thinking of what it means for them that you’re living across the ocean, not what it means for you. They’re thinking of their needs, not yours. In other words, they’re feeling sorry for themselves.”

“Yes.” Brooke looked at her, a sheen in her eyes. “That’s all true. How do you see it so clearly?”

Because that was me.

Because I did the same.

And I paid the price. I’m still paying the price.

“I’m old.” Mabel sat down next to her. “I’d like to say that with age comes wisdom but sadly, I don’t think it always works that way.”

“Mabel, you’re not old.” Brooke fumbled for a tissue and blew her nose.

“It’s all relative. Perhaps I should have said that I’ve been living for long enough to have learned a few things.”

“Well, what you said made me feel better, so thank you for that. It’s true. They are feeling sorry for themselves, and I understand why. But I’m feeling sorry for myself, too.”

She felt Brooke’s pain and her inner conflict and wanted to help. She couldn’t fix her own problems, but maybe she could use her experience to ease the situation for Brooke. “It’s a disappointing situation and it’s fine to feel disappointed.”