Page 108
“Jason—”
“I told Jess about you.”
She straightened, shocked, and looked at him. “Why would you do that?”
“Because she wanted to know if I was going to be okay on my own at Christmas. I told her I was going to be fine because I was with a special friend. She has been desperate for me to meet someone.” He paused. “Come with me, Izzy.”
“Excuse me?”
“When we eventually manage to leave this place, I’m asking you to come with me. My family has decided to delay Christmas for a day or two and celebrate when I arrive. Which basically means I’ll be having two Christmases. And so could you.”
Her head was spinning. “You’re inviting me to meet your family?”
“Yes. They really want to meet you, and I’d like you to meet them.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m hoping you’re someone that is going to be in my life for a long time.”
She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t know what to do. The walls of the room were closing in on her.
She grabbed her scarf and headed to the door.
“I can’t do this right now. I’m sorry, but I can’t.”
“Izzy—”
“We’ll talk later.” She dropped the scarf, retrieved it and then almost tripped over it in her haste to leave the room.
“I love you.”
His words acted like a break. She stopped by the door.
“This isn’t the time to—”
“I’m going to keep saying it until you get used to it. I love you. And deep down under all that insecurity that comes from your past, you know I love you, and that scares you half to death because you think love is unreliable. That’s what you learned when you were young, and you don’t trust it. And you’re leaving now because you think that by leaving first it’s going to hurt less than if you wait around to be hurt. That’s what you do. That’s how you protect yourself. But by protecting yourself from the bad stuff, you’re missing all the good stuff. What if leaving hurts more than staying?”
The door was there. Right there. But she couldn’t seem to move.
She turned to look at him. She was fully clothed and yet his words had stripped her naked.
“You don’t understand.”
“I think I do. It has taken a while, but finally, I think I do. When we spent that night together in the summer and you left before I’d even woken up, I didn’t understand. I thought maybe I’d misread the signals. It was clear you didn’t want to talk about it, and I respected that. We spent more and more time together and I learned a little more about you each time. Every job we did together I fell a little more in love with you. Why do you think I kept taking all those jobs with your company? It was because of you. And while everyone else saw bouncy, fun, sparkly Izzy, I occasionally saw the person underneath. You’re generous and insightful and you care about everyone, but you don’t trust that people will care about you.”
“Jason, please—”
“I gave you space after that night in the summer, and I gave you space when you sent that message to the whole team a few days ago. The one about being caught in a snowdrift.”
She gripped the scarf. “You did see it.”
“Yes, I saw it.”
“But you never said anything.”
“I assumed that if you’d wanted me to see it, you wouldn’t have deleted it. I decided it was best to pretend I hadn’t seen it. Hearing about your childhood, your parents, has helped me understand why you are the way you are. But before you walk out that door and turn your back on this rare and special thing that we have, I want you to know something. Whatever you do here today, whatever you decide, I am never going to stop loving you.”
His words stole the breath from her body.
