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The way he acted with those kids…he must have experience. Younger siblings? How old is he? Surely he’s not a father or married. His ring finger is bare. I don’t even know the name of his village, let alone his surname. As strong as he is, he could be a noble, except I’ve never heard of a noble with power like his. And he’s perfectly comfortable sleeping on the ground like a commoner. I’m certain he’s not Meridian, but I have no idea where he might be from.

Pulling the leather thong from his ponytail, he hooks his thumbs over his ears, then tugs his hair back from his face and reties it with deft fingers. “One foot in front of the other. And try not to pay attention to your dreams too much.”

In a lot of ways, his agreement only hurts more. “I’m not worth it, you know.”

Agnar adjusts his cloak, smoothing the material over his shoulders. Once he erases all signs of the horrors we escaped, he fixes his sky blue eyes on me. They glow in the slice of moonlight over his face. “Worth what?”

Painful as it is, I have to tell him the truth. The one everyone else already knows about me. “I’m not worth saving. I’m not worth much of anything.”

His gaze drifts over me, perusing me from boots to braid as I brace myself for his honesty. “I disagree.”

The tears I’ve been holding back break free and trail down my cheeks. I angle away, hiding in the shadows so I can bat them away.

Too much. Tonight has just been too much. And I just finished my cycle. That’s why I’m crying. Not because of what he said.

Of course Agnar would say that. He complicates everything. He sows confusion everywhere he goes and sticks his nose into other peoples’ business.

Blowing out a hot breath, I will the tears not to fall. Closing my eyes, I dig deep for calm.

I must escape him. If he’d grabbed Stark and fled, maybe I could have gotten away on my own. Then I’d be free to return to Edgehallow, talk with the baron, and find out what the city guard knew about that gambling house and what happened that night.

I’m far away now, but I still need to track down the Everhand and figure out why Rook got involved. And why Agnar is so invested in an object that has nothing to do with him.

If I can get word to Rook that the Wardens require the Everhand to end the epidemic, I’m certain Rook will give it to me. There’s nothing political about saving lives, and with all these refugees relocating to the towns, Rook has to know what’s going on. If what we’ve seen the last few days is indicative of the whole country, we’ll all starve come winter unless this ceases soon.

“You should rest.” Dry leaves rustle behind me, as if Agnar is clearing a spot on the ground.

Glancing over, I’m shocked to find that he isn’t manipulating the earth to create a campsite. Every other time we’ve camped, he’s at least crafted beds or chairs. Tonight, he’s decided not to. Why?

Asking would reveal that I’m missing something, so I seal my lips. Part of me fears he’ll claim I’m not worth the effort, despite him insisting moments ago that I’m worth saving.

Keeping me alive isn’t the same thing as ensuring my comfort. I’m sure once he’s had time to contemplate, he’ll hold me in even lower regard. As if I haven’t spent the last few hours proving that point. Stark was a boy all along. And I don’t even know who Elan is.

I can barely grasp how much he knew about them. He remembered all their names, while I can’t even recall hearing them.

Yes, I kept to myself, but I didn’t think I was that closed off. Though, they did discus a lot of topics that went over my head, so maybe I zoned out more than I realized.

Crossing my legs, I plop into a seated position and rest against a tree, facing away from my savior and captor.

Why can’t I talk to people? What’s wrong with me that I can’t even introduce myself? And what kind of monster does it make me that I blamed someone else for the death of a child I never bothered to get to know?

A bobbing leaf, like a natural metronome slowly counting down time, catches my eye. If I’ve learned anything in my short life, it’s that being alone is always the safest option. Better to be alone and silent than subject yourself to mockery and dismissal.

A wallflower with no walls is just a fragile weed.

Chapter Fifteen

Agnar

Once dawn breaks, we leave the forest behind. I doubt Esme slept a wink, and I sure as shit didn’t. Fearing the creature would sense magic and come charging, I refrained from putting up a wall to keep the night wind off us. Dew drips from the leaves, attacking our heads as we retreat from the shelter of the forest.

My cloak kept me warm enough, but Esme spent the night huddled against a tree, curled up with her head tucked into her arms. We lost our gear and bedrolls when we fled from the creature. Lost the refugees. Lost everything. While she attempted to doze, I gazed into the distance, listening to every insect chirp, frog fart, and birdcall.

All night, the same thoughts raced through my mind.

What beckoned that creature to us? Most animals, even magical ones, would avoid a building with people inside.

Unless my excessive, showy use of magic was the lure. My attempt to provide Mira and Stark with a little extra comfort may have cost them their minds. How many of the others died last night due to my vanity?