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Igot back to my feet and waited patiently as Ryan talked to the wall, keeping my hands behind my back and rocking on my toes.

I didn’t want to seem like I was eavesdropping, so I kept my gaze swivelling around nonchalantly. He seemed to be going through something so I pulled my phone out and typed out a message now that my anger slightly cooled off.

Owain

I don’t appreciate you hiring ExorSquad for my friends. It seems like you just don’t want to accept I’m happy where I am.

Mom

We just want what’s best for you.

Owain

I think what’s best for me right now is to not talk to you for a little while. I just wanted to let you know I will be blocking your numbers. I’ll reach out once I’m ready…

Mom

Owain…

I blocked her number before the next message came through.

I sighed heavily as I put my phone away and looked up only to find Ryan still squabbling with himself. He seemed to be losing too.

I didn’t understand why Ryan was so embarrassed. He certainly had nothing to be ashamed of. I peeked out of the corner of my eye down south on reflex. The girth and circumference alone were impressive, and everything was very well groomed. I felt a small swoop in my stomach and clenched instinctually. It was a reminder that I hadn’t so much as played with a toy in months.

Maybe I had a toy that would match Ryan’s size? Maybe I should ask about the specifications?

I shook my head. I needed to concentrate on saving the Last Resort first. Maybe after I’d won Ryan over, I could ask. If Ryan saw the charm of this place, then he wouldn’t even think about ruining it, I was sure of it. I just needed to show him how wonderful it was.

My brain raced, running over my rehearsed scripts about the Last Resort’s best qualities.

Right on the cliffs!

Architecture from the thirteenth century!

Authentic Welsh cuisine!

Special guests!

Spectacular intermittent events every day!

*Avoid during pirate hours. May cause unintended injury. Food may contain ectoplasm, do not consume if allergic. Guests may be undead. See events list for haunting times I mentally added.

Speaking of, I checked my watch and realised it was about time for our evening show. I glanced around, checking whether Popty had really cooled off. The walls weren’t bleeding, so that was a good sign. I stepped forward and tapped Ryan on the shoulder.

“Sorry to interrupt, but one of the events included in your package is due to begin in twenty minutes. It’s our pre-dinner show.”

Ryan cracked one dark eye open to look at me. He had wonderfully long eyelashes. “What about the microwave ghost?”

“Popty’s aura is settling. We just need to give him space for the rest of the day.”

“I’m glad he’s so in touch with his emotions,” he drawled. Those lips also would have been attractive if they didn’t say such rude things.

I put my hands on my hips. “The worms ate his body, not his feelings.”

Ryan seemed at a loss for words.

“Shall we continue the tour and end in the dining room?” I suggested.