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“Good.” He swallows and puts on a smile, one that doesn’t even come close to reaching his eyes. “Do you mind me asking what happened between you?”

“Of course not. Though it’s not a very interesting story. We had a fling the summer after I finished college, and when he found out I was pregnant, he split.”

Beckett stiffens, and I realize an absent father story might hit too close to home. “It took him a little while to come around to the idea, but he’s been in Ava’s life since she was two. He sees her once a month and longer over the summer.”

My face scrunches momentarily and Beckett’s quick to notice.

“What’s wrong?”

I let my head drop to the bed before looking up at him again, finding him sitting up.

“Nothing, I was just thinking about a conversation we had about joint fifty-fifty custody. It was hard enough not getting to spend Christmas together. I can’t imagine only seeing her every other week.”

“How would that work with school?”

“He wants me to move there.”

Beckett’s nostrils flare, but he otherwise keeps a straight face. “Is that what you want?”

“No, which is why we kind of tabled the conversation. But I’m always worried he’ll bring it up again.”

“I can’t even imagine going through that. When my dad left, he never looked back. And while it was hard for Mom, I think that was better in the long run.” The rare mention of his life makes my chest ache, but before I get the chance to respond, he moves the conversation on.

“Did…ahh…” He trails off and scratches his head, his expression pinched. “Did you ever try to rekindle⁠—”

“God, no,” I laugh as I interrupt him. “There is no love lost there. We had fun for the few weeks we were together. At least, I did. But I never thought what we had would grow into anything. Though, I suppose it did. It grew into an adorable but highly opinionated little girl.”

“Ava? Never. I don’t believe you.”

“Just wait. She appears innocent at first. But the more time you spend with her, the more her true self shines through.” My eyes go round as I finish speaking, and I almost look away until Beckett's eyes crinkle with a smile.

“She’s a great girl.”

“She is. And she’s in awe of you.”

“I get that a lot.” He winks a very un-Beckett-like wink, and I burst out laughing.

Like always, we lose time as we talk, and when I get back from the bathroom, with only a sheet wrapped around me, Beckett’s up and getting dressed.

He smiles in resignation when our eyes meet, and I return it softly. This moment had to come; I just hate that it’s coming so soon.

“You have to go?”

“I should, yes.” He buckles his jeans but makes no move to leave.

“Thank you for another great night.” I smile, working hard to keep my tone light.

“No, thank you.” The smallest of smirks tugs at his lips, and I stifle a laugh until reality sets in.

“Ugh, this sucks. Doesn’t it? If only it was another time. Another place.”

“I’m sorry, Lily, I⁠—”

“It’s not on you. As amazing as last night was, I have no expectations about what comes next. We both have a lot going on. I’m just not ready to say goodbye.”

“Fuck, me either. Only, I don’t know what else to do.” He runs a hand through his hair, his torn expression hitting me in the chest, and I blurt out false hope for both of us.

“How do you feel about ‘see you soon’?”