Page 5

“Oh. Um…” A cute, subtle blush rises from her neck and spreads to her face as an unusual tingle shoots through my body.

“Stadium?” I say, saving her from answering, or maybe myself from rejection. “I’ll head there now.” I turn and take a step to leave, but spin my head over my shoulder and add, “It was very nice to meet you, Scarlett.”

She doesn’t respond, but the corners of her lips tick up slightly. Her smile is small and hesitant, but beautiful, nonetheless.

* * *

I swipe my card at the private entrance to the stadium that is reserved for player entry. The little green light blinks back at me as I push open the door. The place is quiet, since most of the players and coaches left hours ago. I nod to a security guard before entering an empty locker room. My eyes glance over to the corner, where I discover a large target. My feet automatically stroll over to the edge of the room, where I find Sebastian curled into a ball as the room’s only occupant.

I take another step forward only to notice that his body is trembling. His face is bright red, and his shirt is soaked through.

“Hey, buddy, are you okay?” I don’t think I’ve ever called anyone buddy before in my life, but the words fit.

He slowly raises his head, and his eyes are distant and detached.

“Hey, buddy,” I repeat. “Take a nice big breath for me.”

Sebastian’s eyes are elsewhere, but he follows my command.

“Good,” I praise. “Now take a deep breath through your nose, and exhale through your mouth. Good. Now again.”

I walk Sebastian through a few small breathing techniques before I notice his shaking has subsided, and his color has returned to normal. His eyes look brighter, too, but they are facing down, away from me.

“Why does the locker room smell like vanilla shit?” I ask, trying to lighten the mood and maybe distract him from his panic attack.

He glances to his side, where there’s a pile of letters and notes lying on the floor next to him, some still sealed and some strewn about.

“Wow. That’s a lot of mail,” I comment after noticing a few dozen pieces of paper.

“Have you been on social media?” he asks.

No, I haven’t. I try to disconnect from any media as much as humanly possible, if I’m being honest. Most of my updates come from my family or teammates, and I haven’t interacted with many people today.

I just shake my head, and Sebastian lets out a long breath. He reaches for his phone and taps a few buttons before handing it to me.

My eyes land on a popular app where there’s a post with a woman in only a Goodick jersey that says “can confirm” with a string of emojis and hashtags followed by a number of likes and comments. I tap on the top hashtag, and several more similar posts from different women pop up.

“Geez, Goodick, your dick sees a lot of action,” I jest.

Sebastian closes his eyes and winces.

Okay, no more jokes. Got it.

Before I can say anything else, Sebastian’s body trembles again, and a wheeze slips out from him.

“Slow, deep breath,” I repeat again.

Shit. I’m so bad at this and not helpful at all. It’s a good thing I became a football player and not something else.

After a few minutes, Sebastian settles, and I share a story about a prank I pulled when I was a rookie. I made the unfortunate mistake of pranking the wrong teammate, a cranky veteran who did not appreciate the fact that I carefully placed Icy Hot in his jockstrap.

By the end of my anecdote, I have Sebastian’s full attention, and he’s laughing with me, or at me—I’m not sure, but does it really matter? This dude is doing better, at least I hope so.

“Feeling okay?” I ask simply, most likely ruining the camaraderie we shared.

He nods once. We are next to each other on the locker room floor, both silent for what feels like hours, but more likely just a minute or two. I have nowhere I need to be. I already canceled on Stan for the time being. Practice is over for the rest of the day, and I don’t have any friends in Boston yet. Plus, from what I can tell, Sebastian is a cool guy. He’s been very welcoming and friendly so far.

After a few minutes, he turns his large body slightly towards me and takes a deep breath.