Page 115

His attempt at a smile was a weak affair. ‘It has indeed.’

Her eyes searched his face, and she moved a lock of hair from his forehead with a gentle hand, ran a finger over one of his eyebrows, then her thumb brushed his cheek as though she were cataloguing his features.

When she had looked her fill, she brought her gaze back to his for a moment, then took hold of his hands and looked at them.

‘If you offer of marriage is still open, I should like to accept,’ she said quietly. Eyes till focused on their hands. ‘I very nearly had to face a life without you and… and I did not like it.’

His heart clenched so hard in his chest it took a moment to breathe. ‘It is still open, and I would marry you in a heartbeat, but there are still things I must tell you before you decide.’

She looked at him and nodded. ‘Very well.’

‘First...’ He had to clear his throat. He had imagined doing this when he was calm and in control of himself, not when his emotions were in tatters, but there was no putting it off. He had to do it.

‘I… first, and before anything else, I need to tell you how much I love you. I love you. Only you.’

Her eyebrows lifted, and she smiled for the first time since he’d walked in. ‘You do?’

He nodded. ‘I was afraid to admit it to myself and so I was an absolute ass. Because of it, I spent all of those long, lonely months without you. It gave me time to think and stop being such an idiot.’

‘I won’t argue with that,’ she said, with a gentle arch of her eyebrow that was achingly familiar.

‘But before we go any further, you have to know…’ His breath caught in his chest, making words difficult. ‘You have to know that… over the course of the affair with Bess, we had two children. I have two children.’

He swallowed as he watched her take that in and waited for her to run from the room. All he could do was hope for a miracle.

‘Two children,’ she said, and sat straighter, looking a little more herself.

‘Two.’

‘What are their names?’

It was not what he expected her to say. He looked at her and licked dry lips.

‘Harriet, who is ten, and George, who is nearly eight. They live with another family, but I visit often.’

‘I imagine it has been hard for you to be parted from them.’

Granville swallowed. ‘It has. I miss them terribly and they grow up so fast.’

‘They are my cousins,’ Harriet said, looking thoughtful.

Granville kissed her hand, barely daring to hope. ‘They are. Can you bear it?’

Harriet sat for a moment, and then visibly pulled herself together. ‘What is your intention once we are married?’

‘Intention?’

‘Will they continue to live with this family, or would you like them to live with us?’

Granville didn’t know what to say. He stared, eyes instantly filling with tears. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. Of all the scenarios that had played out in his head once he’d told her of Harriet and George’s existence, the possibility that she might want to bring them into his household had never occurred to him.

‘You’d…’ He had to stop.

‘Of course I would. They are children. Your children. They should live with their papa if that is what they wish. They do know you are their papa?’

He nodded.

‘Then we have much to discuss and much to arrange.’