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‘I’m sorry to hear that,’ he says when I tell him, and I can see the depth of understanding in his eyes. As he bites into the pie, his eyebrows rise like mine did. He’s half laughing as he chews and swallows, nodding his approval.

‘I know, took me by surprise!’

‘That boy,’ he says, and shakes his head.

‘Yes, that boy indeed.’

I look around the forest, my eyes travelling over the beautifully cleared paths and delicately garlanded lights. There has to be something I can do to make the Christmas tree farm work, for Will’s sake.

One last Christmas, I remind myself.

The chubby robin flies down to perch nearby, and Horse scatters some crumbs for him.

‘I won’t cut any more trees until we know whether or not we’re going to sell any,’ says Horse.

But the one and only customer we see that afternoon is someone who got lost looking for Christmas Tree World. No one is coming to us to buy trees. No one is coming at all.

Apart from Scarlett, who manages to run over one of my handmade signs and damage the robin painted on it. She steps out of the car.

‘Wow, Gwen, I’ve just heard from Luke. Look, I hope it wasn’t something I said,’ she says, clearly trying to put on a performance. There is no sign of Mogs this time. ‘I am so proud of what you’d done here!’ She looks around. ‘But, look, Lukey seems set on this place, rather than the other farm we’ve seen. So, if it helps you out, we can be in as soon as you like. Just pick a day. I have solicitors and removal men on speed dial. We can complete and get it all sorted!’ She claps her hands together and beams at me.

I stare at her, fury bubbling up inside me. I can’t find the words to tell her what I think about how she’s ruined all of our work.

‘I’ll let you know our plans in the morning,’ I say, sounding as steely as I feel. ‘In the meantime, I think it would be best if you left.’

I hear the pups barking from inside the barn and excuse myself to go and keep them company. I bury my face in their fur, knowing she’s right. Leaving here now is the only answer.

The rest of the day passes quietly. Out on the main road, countless cars are lining up to get into Christmas Tree World.

As the light starts to fade, my phone pings. It’s Gareth, messaging to ask how the first day went and to tell me he’s dating again. The receptionist from his old school got in touch after his visit, and they’ve been seeing each other.

I’m happy for him; I text back and tell him so. I don’t tell him how our first day has really gone, because I’m not ready for him to know I’ve made a massive mistake. But I am still absolutely sure that even if I don’t have a solid plan, moving in with him would not have been the right thing to do. It sounds like he’s moved on from Paddy, at least; so that’s a good thing.

I glance at my watch. It’s probably time to go and take the Open signs down for the night.

Looks like we won’t be selling any Christmas trees after all.

Chapter 31

It’s coming up for five o’clock now, and dark. The solar lanterns that Luke has installed glow all the way up the drive. He’s spent the day in the barn with the puppies, checking all the lighting connections and the ones in the forest too, over and over again.

‘Come on, Tegan,’ I call to her, and we walk up towards the gate at the road end to close it for the evening. As I’m pushing it shut, a car approaches and slows.

‘I’m so sorry – I got lost,’ says a young woman, opening her window.

‘Oh, don’t worry, it happens a lot,’ I say. ‘Just head down the hill, you’ll see the inflatable snowman and merry-go-round they’ve got this year . . .’ I don’t add that they also have lovely stars and parcel dancers, drummers and a cracking Father Christmas. ‘You’ll see the lit-up signs and banners.’ They can probably be seen from space, I think.

She looks over her shoulder, confused. ‘You mean, back the way I’ve just come?’

‘Did you come up from the main road?’ I ask, wondering how she could have missed it.

‘Yes, past Christmas Tree World. I followed the signs. They were very clear and beautifully painted. Can’t believe I went wrong earlier. Just followed the line of cars.’

I glance down the valley towards the main road: the inflatable snowman is waving, and the whole lot is lit up like an airport runway waiting for an incoming flight. I can see lines of cars waiting to pull up in the car park.

‘Sorry, where did you say you were looking for?’

‘Christmas Tree Farm. I followed the signs from the main road, with the little robins on.’ She looks at me. ‘You are Christmas Tree Farm, aren’t you?’