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‘See how polite they are?’ says Gareth with satisfaction. ‘And happy.’ He nods towards the ebullient rugby boys and gives a little swing of his own leg. ‘Looks like they’ve had a heck of a game.’

Will and I both jump as a loud buzzer sounds along the corridors. Gareth beams even more widely.

‘Just stay where you are,’ he tells us, as if we’ve been caught up in a military operation.

Suddenly, like ants on an ant farm, boys of different heights are pouring into the big open wood-panelled space from all directions, crossing paths with purpose and intention. We’re surrounded by chatter and footsteps. Will moves closer to me.

‘Walk, don’t run!’ I hear a deep voice call above the clamour.

I’m almost nauseated at the memory of how overwhelmed I used to feel trying to get from one part of school to another. The anxiety of knowing you’d get into trouble if you were late, but not being allowed to run, was suffocating. I stand rigidly in place for a few minutes as the crowds surge around us. At last, with a final bang of a distant door, silence falls as the next lesson begins.

Gareth takes a deep breath, glances up and down the corridors, and then sets off towards the school office, where he introduces us.

For the next hour we visit science labs, computer rooms, the sports hall and the main hall, where Gareth takes great pride in finding his name written on the badminton winners’ list for 1984. He’s enjoying every bit of this tour, to the same degree as I’m hating it – but, I remind myself, this is not about me.

‘I’ll just hand you over to the house staff,’ says the headmaster, ‘and they can show you around the dormitories.’

Gareth thanks him for his time.

‘Goodbye, Will,’ the headmaster says and holds out his hand. ‘We look forward to seeing you again, hopefully.’

Will eyes him warily. He doesn’t shake hands, instead cowering back into my side like the young boy he is, the shy one I first met before he and Tegan became firm friends and Huey, Dewey, Louie and Gloria became his daily routine. I slip a protective arm around his shoulder and shake the headmaster’s hand on his behalf.

We stop at the cloakroom so that Will can use the toilet before we tour the dormitories. I’m looking forward to breathing air outside the disinfectant-infused wooden panelling of this place. As I wait outside the restroom for Will, I hear sniffing. Lots of sniffing. I look this way and that, and eventually I see him: a small boy wearing a huge pair of glasses, sitting half concealed against the wall amongst the coats. I remember that feeling well from school. It always seemed like a relatively safe place to hide away, amongst the long winter coats.

‘Hello? Are you okay?’ I ask.

The boy stops sniffing.

‘Oh yes, perfectly fine, thank you.’ He pushes his glasses up his nose. He looks a little younger than Will, maybe seven or eight. He has a PE kitbag on his lap, and as he stands up it tumbles to the floor on long strings.

‘You look upset,’ I say, concerned.

The boy runs his forearm along his nose, then runs his hand down his forearm.

‘I – I had to come and get my PE kit. I forgot it.’

‘And do you like PE?’ I ask.

He shakes his head.

‘Do you like it here at the school?’ I ask tentatively.

The boy lowers his head and then, slowly, shakes it again.

‘I want to go home,’ he says.

‘Oh, poor you,’ I say. Without thinking, I step forward as if to comfort or even hug him. He recoils in horror.

‘I have to go,’ he says and hurries out of the cloakroom, dragging his PE kit on its long strings behind him. He’s just a young boy, I think, a lonely young boy. Like Will.

Will emerges from the restroom, his face serious.

‘Listen,’ I say, as he comes over to me. ‘I want you to know that if you don’t like it here, you don’t have to come.’ Together, we make our way out of the cloakroom and back towards the foyer, where Gareth and our dormitory tour guide are waiting. ‘It’s your decision,’ I say quietly to Will, before we reach them.

As we drive home through the late afternoon darkness, Will falls fast asleep holding his spice tin in his lap.

‘Okay?’ asks Gareth, glancing across at me.