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“Um, yeah. I love them to death, but I gotta have some space.” I breathe out a half laugh, half scoff that sounds super awkward.

Drew clears his throat. “Well, like I told you before, I turned my basement into an apartment for my sister. But she wants to move into her own place with some friends. Since I’m on call at least one weekend a month, I figured I’d always use the apartment for a nanny, but now that Penny’s in school, I don’t think that’s really necessary.” He crosses his arms, unknowingly drawing attention to his broad chest and impressive biceps. “And if you were interested in babysitting Penny during my on-call weekends, I would deduct more off the rent, of course.”

Quickly, I pry my eyes away from his muscles, telling myself I should think of Drew like a brother … or maybe a really, really distant cousin … once removed.

I’ve never really looked at Drew, like really looked at him. I haven’t noticed any men since Sam died. These past few years have honestly been a total blur for me. I’ve tried to be present for Samantha, but it’s been difficult to keep my sadness at bay.

“Yeah, that sounds great. I hardly ever have weekend plans.” The truth is, I’d be grateful to babysit on the weekends. Weekends have been so lonely. That’s when everyone is on dates, or going out with their spouse. Which means I’m usually just home hanging out with Samantha.

“Okay, great.” He smiles. “Let me show you the apartment.”

I follow him to the hallway off of the kitchen and he unlocks a door that leads downstairs. We walk down the stairway and the tidy apartment comes into view.

There’s a small hallway at the bottom of the steps that leads toward the kitchen and living room.

I’m instantly pleased that this isn’t a dark and dank basement. There’s several recessed windows that bring lots of natural light into the space. The walls are painted a robin's egg blue, and the grey carpet looks new. The space smells clean, with a hint of citrus. There’s a cute wall collage with a map and some artwork featuring famous landmarks from around the world.

It’s a really pretty apartment; I could definitely see little Sam and I living here comfortably. Drew continues the tour and shows me the kitchenette attached to the living space. There’s a microwave, a fridge, and a small, two-burner stove top.

“I didn’t put a full kitchen in here, thinking just my sister would be using it. You’d obviously be welcome to use anything in the main house, if you felt comfortable with that.”

I chuckle. “That’s not a big deal. I hate cooking, anyway.”

Drew laughs and gestures back toward the small hallway where the bedrooms must be. First, he shows me the full bathroom and then the two bedrooms. One bedroom has a queen bed and modern grey dresser, and the other room is empty.

“This is perfect. You did a great job with this apartment, Drew.”

His cheeks color just a bit, although it’s hard to tell against his tanned skin. His hazel eyes meet mine, looking more brown than green today against his black t-shirt.

I hear the door at the end of the hallway jiggle and Penny bursts through, a dark-haired woman trailing behind her. They look so much alike, my breath catches. This must be Emily.

Penny giggles. “Boo! I wanted to scare you guys.” She looks up at me. “Betcha didn’t know what that door went to.”

The woman behind her speaks up, “I’m so sorry, I reminded her not to use this door anymore, and she snuck away from me.”

“Sorry, I never bolted that door when Emily lived down here.” He stuffs his hands into his pockets. “Oh, this is Emily, by the way. My sister.”

“Hey, Emily, great to meet you!”

“You too,” she says quietly. “This little squirt has told me all about your family.” Emily smiles down at her niece, then cups her hand around her mouth to whisper to me, “I think she has a bit of a crush on your brother, Brooks.”

I roll my eyes, but then laugh. “Don’t tell him that. He’s already conceited enough as it is.”

We laugh, then Emily shuffles Penny back through the door and up the stairs.

Drew crosses his arms again over his totally average, totally unattractive pec muscles. “So anyway, Emily has already moved her stuff out, so you’d be free to move in whenever, if you wanted to.”

“I think this would be perfect for me and Samantha. Could we move in this weekend? I gotta give my parents a few days to adjust to the idea.” I grimace.

“That would work. I’m off that day so I could help out.” One side of his mouth pulls upward. “I’ve been sweating trying to find a trustworthy sitter, so this works out for me too.”

“Well then, this will be great for both of us! See you Saturday then?”

“See you Saturday.” He smiles.

I walk inside my parents’ house, excited about my newfound independence and the idea of moving forward with my life.

I know Sam would be proud of me.