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Tony was silent, listening, still stroking my back.

“I can hardly remember...” I sobbed quietly. “I think he put something in my drink when I wasn't paying attention. And then... then he followed me to the bathroom...” My breathing quickened on its own, my voice became shakier, and Tony's hand paused, pulling me closer to him. “I told him to leave, but he wouldn't go.” I shook my head again, sobbing quietly, allowing the pain in my chest to wash over me. “He just wouldn't leave.” Telling him hurt more than it had hurt when I had told Vivienna. “It all happened so damn fast... He just... lifted up my skirt... and then...”

My voice broke and I began to sob uncontrollably into Tony's T-shirt.

I couldn't finish the sentence, didn't even try, didn't want to look up at Tony, who was now clutching my green and yellow floral cardigan, his embrace around me tight, as if he had frozen.

He didn't say anything, just held me, and I cried, ashamed of all the things I had just shared with him.

“Who was this man...”

There was something cold in his toneless voice. So cold that I pulled away from him and looked at him searchingly.

“I didn't even know him.”

His jaw seemed strangely tense.

“Was that your first time?”

He didn't look at me, staring past me, out into the dense forest.

“What?”

Now he looked at me.

“Your first sex?”

I didn't want to call it that. Everything about it felt wrong and disgusting. Yet that was exactly what had happened...

“Yes...”

Talking about it was more uncomfortable than I had expected, especially with my uncle, but it had been the right decision. Even though a lot had been torn between him and my family in recent years, he was still my friend.

Tony turned to the steering wheel, started the engine, and steered us back onto the road.

“When I find him, that bastard is dead!”

Shocked, I sank back into my seat, trying to process the fact that I had just spoken about what had happened at the party for the second time and that now two people knew. That it now felt even more real...

I hoped Tony wouldn't get himself into trouble for me, hoped he wouldn't bring up the subject ever again.

Trappin Adams Hearing

Mr Kamera

When we got home, I filled bowls with snacks while Tony picked out a series for us to watch.

I was grateful he didn't bring up the subject again, even though I felt like it was still haunting the corners of this house, like cobwebs you missed when cleaning.

It wasn't until we were watching the second episode of Breaking Bad that I managed to distract myself and ignore that Tony was unusually quiet.

I was afraid he would jump up at any moment and storm out of the house to find this guy and beat him up for me.

At some point, he pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket, along with a lighter.

“Ezra will smell that,” I warned him, but he just snorted.

“Ezra can kiss my ass.”