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Bayla followed my gaze. “You mean…” She hesitated, and for a split second, I thought I saw a purple flicker pass through her eyes.

“What do you think about reviving what Alice started back then? Continuing her research? All the things she had planned, the projects they had worked on together… What if we continued all of that?”

Last Night Stand

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After the last lecture, I returned to the dormitory exhausted. My stomach hurt strangely, and I had no idea how long ago I had last eaten, despite the many times I gave in to my pregnancy cravings. I couldn't keep half of what I ate down, and the Salma didn't make it any better.

The child seemed to be intent on making me feel sick. Another punishment I received for my behavior. It was a miracle that it was still alive.

For days, I had limited myself to taking no more than one daily dose of Salma. I would have preferred to do without it entirely, but then what had happened during my last internship session at the DLSC would happen again, and I couldn't allow that.

I had lost control. In front of him.

Pressing my lips together, I tried to push the warmth of his hands, his chest, out of my memories.

I took a deep breath.

Don't think about him.

Don't. Think. About. Him.

The welcome distraction was just walking through the kitchen and putting water on for pasta.

“Grace”

I tried to sound friendly, hating myself for no longer feeling joy when she was around. I had never really felt it, but Grace was a part of my life. I wasn't ready to give that up just because I had upset her a few times.

Grace didn't turn to me, so I tried a different approach.

“Do you need help?”

“No, thank you...” she replied monotonously without looking at me.

“I could...”

“No, Julie!” I flinched and bit my tongue. “I don't need your help!”

The Salma was no longer working. My heart burned as if someone had scraped a razor blade across its surface. And so I felt the growing coldness in my fingertips.

Grace still wouldn't forgive me.

How did she manage, time and again, to make me feel the urge to apologize to her first? Wasn't it her who had distanced herself and left me all alone?

“How many more times do I have to apologize to you?”

Grace spun around. Her usually brown eyes flashed green.

“Preferably not at all!”

Back then, I would have left immediately, but by now I knew I didn’t have to fear Grace’s element.

“Especially not if you’re just going to ruin it again shortly after!”

“We can’t treat each other like this forever,” I sighed.

I was ashamed that I sounded desperate. The old Julie shone through the still-weak facade of the new one.