Page 9
My Gaeilge is regrettably rusty, but I’m fairly certain my mother just promised my father a “reward” if he calmed himself. I fight the immediate urge to grimace.
I watch the change in him anyway—subtle, but plain as daylight if you know what to look for. The hard set of his jaw eases, and some of the tension leaves his shoulders as the sharp edge of his temper dulls beneath her gaze.
Still, my throat closes as if cinched by rope. I swallow, shoot Robert a look that begs for rescue, and force the sound out of my mouth. “We… it isnae what it—”
Alex lunges in before I can finish a single blessed word. “We didn’t mean to get caught up in it—”
“Alex,” I hiss, but he’s already off like a startled hen.
Robert steps forward then, shoulders squared as if presenting himself for judgment. “If you would cast stones, sir, cast them at me. The authorities had marked me long before our, um, forced removal. They sought to make examples of any who stood too near. James and Alexander were guilty of nothing but loyalty. If there’s dishonour, it’s mine alone.”
Everything stills. Robert’s eyes are fixed on my father, and Da stares back, as if deciding whether the lad is courage made flesh or a fool begging for trouble.
Ma lifts her chin and draws a folded paper from her pocket. “A letter reached us before ya even crossed the firth.” She lays it on the table. “James withdrew from classes, it says. Voluntarily.” Her eyes move to Robert. “But I can smell a softer lie when it’s written in ink. Ye’ll tell us what truly happened?”
Robert exhales. “We were expelled in all but name. But make no mistake, the choice was pressed upon us. I would not hold my tongue about the injustices in Dublin. James and Alex stood with me, and for that, they bore the cost meant for me alone.”
The quiet that follows is thick enough to choke on.
Ma turns to Da, and he answers her look. A touch of the storm leaves his face, though only in the slightest.
“So that’s the truth of it.” His gaze settles on us again. “To be cast out for honour is nae disgrace. I’ll not name you fools, though ye’ve danced near enough to it, ye reckless wee gobshites. Given our tenants plenty tae gossip on for months.”
He leans forward, elbows resting on his knees. The heat of his anger has cooled, but the hard steel of him is unchanged.
“Thrown out, not for drinkin’, idlin’, or sin. Cast out for speakin’ yer minds. D’ye ken how close that walks to the gallows, lads?”
My voice surprises me with how steady it comes. “We ken it fine, Da. And yet I’d do it again. Better to speak the truth than sit a coward among the frock.”
Alex gives a short, nervous laugh. “They didn’t toss us for folly. They tossed us ‘cause they knew our words could spread faster than fire.”
Robert’s eyes burn bright. “If we are guilty, sir, then guilty of principle. Trinity may scorn us, but history may judge differently one day soon.”
Da sits back, his great hands running over the carved arms. A long sigh rolls out of him. “As I said… to be punished for honour is no’ disgrace. I’ll grant ye that. But ye’ve marked yerselves now. Spies’ll watch. Soldiers’ll listen. Pride will no’ shield ye from prison walls.”
Ma’s voice is softer. “We fear ye’ve made yerselves targets.”
Da nods once. “Ye’ll lie low here. No speeches. No talk of rebellion. Whatever fire burns in Dublin stays in Dublin. You hear me?”
I glance at my friends—both watching me—then nod. “Aye, Da. We promise.”
Alex mutters, “For a while,” under his breath, meant only for Robert and me.
A grin ghosts across Robert’s face, gone the next moment as he bows his head. But the set of his jaw tells me his fire hasn’t dimmed at all. If anything, it burns hotter now.
“Taskill,” Ma says softly, “come away with me a while.”
Da looks as though he might argue, his mouth already parting around some gruff objection. Then he looks at her properly.
Whatever he finds there shuts him up at once.
She holds his gaze, calm as ever, and there is enough promise in it to make him rise from his chair with all the dignity of an eager pup.
“Aye,” he says, far too quickly.
My face twists before I can help it, because there are some things no son should be forced to witness.
Ma catches me at it.
