Page 20

Ten

EVIE

Irarely traveled to my father’s lands, but every once in a while, I felt the need to commune with the fae lands—something to do with the fae crown and how Rowan and I were linked to every fae in existence. His was the safest place to go.

We sat side by side on the loamy earth. Several days had passed since he and Rowan had visited Ethan. Tess and Cliona had come up empty-handed on their research, and I was still scouring the globe looking for dead spots.

Dad bristled with fear and frustration, the most emotion I’d ever seen him show.

I reached over and touched his arm. “She will be okay.”

Dad shook his head once. “She may be alive, Evie, but I doubt she’ll be okay.”

I exhaled. He was right. “We’ll help her get back to herself.”

Dad’s jaw clenched. “She’d been doing so well. If those fucking Shifter Lords⁠—”

Empathy filled me. The Shifter Lords had been responsible for many of our troubles. If Moira hadn’t gone to help Soren, we might not be in this position, but her mother had thrown the lure out in a clever way.

If Moira hadn’t responded to Soren’s bait, Minka would have kept trying. Eventually, all roads might have led here.

“Rowan and I are talking about separating from them,” I said.

Dad’s attention snapped to me. “He would do such a thing?”

I nodded. “Rowan is different from the others. He has no taste for power and doesn’t like to rule.”

Dad snorted. “Good choice for the fae king, then.”

I snickered. “No good queen or king actually wants it. You know it’s true.”

Dad lifted a shoulder. “One day, you two will actually have to rule, you know.”

I waved the hand not trapped in the ground. “But you’re doing such a good job.”

He rolled his eyes. “What would you do if Rowan was no longer tied to the Lords?”

“Mmm. Travel maybe. Make out in public places. Burn down Caelan’s Keep. Dunno. Lots of options.”

“Children?”

I stilled, feeling the ever-present tug of pain when children were mentioned. Mom and Dad were wonderful about not bringing the possibility of grandchildren up, but every once in a while, they probed. Dad more than Mom.

Caelan’s actions still scarred me. Even knowing he was under the influence of magic and hearing his later apologies, there was still a large part of me that considered myself unworthy. Would my children be flawed? Was it wrong to bring children of such hefty mixed blood into the world for others’ judgment? Rowan and I would love them with every single breath in our body, but our love would only go so far.

Words still stung, and a child’s casual cruelty would stick with them forever. I wasn’t sure if I could bear such a thing. But the thought of a child with shapeshifting abilities bearing Rowan’s eyes sent my heart tugging.

I’d thought sometime back I might be pregnant. And maybe I had been. Just at the very beginning stages. Whether my body wasn’t ready or something else had happened, my womb was now empty. How could I mourn something I wasn’t even sure was there?

And did I really want children?

Dad reached for me. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly, letting out a heavy sigh. “You and Rowan would make amazing parents. There aren’t many of those left anymore. Your mother and I would love to have grandchildren to spoil, but it is your decision to make. We will honor whatever you decide.”

He gently turned my chin so I could meet his eyes. “But if you hesitate because of that bastard, Caelan, know his prejudices are not your problem. You are who you are, Evangeline, and any child would be blessed to share your blood.”

Tears pricked the backs of my eyes. “Thanks, Dad.”

He leaned over and kissed my forehead, magic sinking into my skin, a blessing from the Horned God. “I can still kill him if you’d like. In fact, ’twould be my pleasure.”