Page 13

A monk set the tray across Torin’s lap. There was a deep bowl of something, smelling much better than the meal I had eaten. It smelled so good. I raised up so I could peek inside it, trying to keep from crying now from relief and jealousy. It looked like yummy stuff swimming in a broth. Beside it lay a chunk of dark bread, a wedge of pale cheese, and a small piece of… was that salmon? It looked flaky and tender.

A mug of ale and a smaller cup of something stood beside the plate.

A monk gestured with his hands, and Torin spoke in Gaelic and they went back and forth for a moment, then the monk, I swear, shot me a look. He picked up my empty bowl and they bowed and left the room.

Torin’s grin was so wide I thought his face might break.

I huffed. “I thought I ate all your food…”

“Ye likely suffered a great deal over it. Yet here is my food in front of me and ye dinna do anything shameful at all. That ought tae teach ye. Help me with m’pillow.”

I helped him sit up a little, propping him with the thin pillow.

He looked at the food hungrily. “I canna decide what tae eat first…”

Then he asked, “Ye are poutin’? Is this the same as the meal ye ate earlier?”

I shook my head. “No, earlier it was a… like oatmeal.”

“Ye must be verra disappointed that ye dinna share the bowl of mush and now ye are wantin’ tae share m’pottage, such is life though…” He put a big bite in his mouth and chewed happily. “Ye canna get in between a warrior and his meal, tis not wise, and yer husband deserves it all — daena he deserve it?”

I sighed. “Yeah, he deserves it. I get it, I don’t want any, anyway. I don’t deserve it. You eat it.” I licked my lips though.

He noticed and his brow raised. “I suppose I could share a bite. Ye were cryin’ over it, full of shame, and ye are likely still hungry…”

I tried to keep my lip from trembling, but my voice cracked when I said, “I don’t think I could, my stomach hurts. I’m really… I can’t believe I did that.”

He looked at me sadly. “I am just teasin’ ye, mo leannan, ye ken it, daena ye ken it?”

I shook my head morosely. “You must hate me. You don’t have to be nice.”

“Ye think I would hate ye because ye ate the bowl of grains the brothers brought us? Ye speak like someone who has never been hungry before! I hae been hungry, I ken how ye must hae felt. If ye had been asleep when they brought a dish of porridge in, I would hae eaten it. Twas warm?”

I nodded.

“Ye had tae eat it! If it had gone cold it would hae been ruined, and both of us would hae been hungry. At least ye got a bite tae eat.” He put another bite in his mouth and chewed. “And I needed the sleep, once I finish eatin’ all of this I will sleep again.”

I didn’t mean to lick my lips, but they were dry.

He tore the crusty bread in half and passed part to me.

I said, “But you’re hungry and twice my size.”

He said, “Eat it, when ye hae some food, ye can share it with yer husband⁠—”

Just then the door opened up and two more monks entered with a second tray. On it was a bowl of the broth, a piece of salmon, and another hunk of bread. All for me.

Torin was grinning.

They put the tray beside me on the table.

I murmured, “Thank you, thank you, thank you so much,” because I was so filled with gratitude I would have kissed their feet if I had thought it was acceptable. Probably not, they barely looked at me.

Torin spoke to them, they bowed and left.

His smile drew down when he saw my tears again. “Pour us both some ale, we need it with all yer weepin’. Tis going tae be a long night.”

“Now I’m weeping because I’m so grateful. This is totally different. Did you know this was coming?”