Page 53

We went to bed early, both of us exhausted. Maddy fell asleep with her head on my chest and wrapped in my arms. Our lovemaking had been different tonight. Slower, quieter, tender. We didn’t speak much, letting our bodies say the words our mouths couldn’t. We moved together in sync, connected in the most intimate of ways, even as our hearts ached. My orgasm felt subdued, the rush of pleasure tinged with a sensation of regret. Her adorable habit of yelling out odd things when her release hit her was absent. Instead, she whimpered my name, the sound hushed.

Her tears were silent. Small drips of heartache that overshadowed what should be a celebration for her. With the nursing shortage, the government had implemented this program, and given Maddy’s marks, it wasn’t a surprise she had been included in the chance to participate. It was a great opportunity for her. A tremendous amount of work, but I knew she could do it. I also knew I couldn’t be the reason for her to hesitate. She had to take this chance and grab it. I would miss her terribly, but I had to be supportive. She would do the same for me if the roles were reversed.

I glanced down at her, the light from the window highlighting the dampness on her cheeks. Her small hand rested on my chest over my heart, her hair scattered on the pillow around her. I would miss holding her. Miss the tenderness she offered so freely. She had an instinctual way of knowing what others needed before they often did. She would carry that over to her nursing career and be amazing.

I only had to let her go in order for her to be able to do it.

I shut my eyes, tugging her closer at that thought.

It was only a year, I told myself.

We could do this.

CHAPTER 13

MATTHEW

Neither of us slept well, each pretending to do so in order not to disturb the other. But as we looked at each other across the small table early the next morning, it was obvious with our bleary eyes that not much rest had been found.

Sue had already been there, informing Maddy she had the bakery covered and to only concentrate on what she needed to do in order to be ready to leave as soon as possible.

Maddy pulled a leg up to her chest, resting her chin on it as she studied me.

“I don’t know how to do this,” she whispered.

“Me either,” I admitted.

I hadn’t expected to fall for her so quickly. I realized how ingrained she already was in my life. The calls, texts, unexpected moments with her, had become part of my daily experiences.

And that was about to stop. Abruptly.

“I have so much I need to do today,” she said, glancing at the list she’d jotted down as the coffeemaker pumped away behind her earlier. “Phone calls, paperwork, arrangements.”

I scrubbed my face. “I called Aiden in Toronto. He is part of BAM, which owns a ton of properties there. My adopted uncles,” I explained. “He said they had some studios available, but none of them are close to the school. But if you can’t find anything else, he would be happy to loan you one for a while until you find a place.”

Her eyes widened. “Generous.”

I shrugged. “Family.”

“I’ll know more this morning.”

“I guess I should get out of your hair so you can get on with it,” I said lightly, my heart cracking a little as I did. I didn’t want to go. I wanted to stay and be with her. There wasn’t much I could do to help, but I wanted to stay close. Soak up as much of her smiles and laughter as I could. Even though, I admitted to myself, neither of us seemed in the smiles and laughter mood.

“I only need a couple of hours,” she said, setting her leg on the floor and grabbing my hand. “I want you to come back.”

“I will,” I soothed. She looked anxious and unsure. “I’ll go run a few errands. Pick you up some boxes and tape for packing.”

She glanced around. “Everything here is staying. Sue and I decorated this place together, but it’s mostly hers. A few books and my clothes, plus personal stuff. I think all I need are a couple of boxes to pack away some things I’ll leave in storage.” She frowned. “I think Sue has space for a couple of boxes.”

“I have a storage locker. Mostly empty. I can store whatever you need.”

She squeezed my hand. “Thank you.”

“Anything for you,” I replied.

Our eyes met and locked. “I’m going to miss you,” she whispered, her voice thick.

“Me too. But it’s only a year. We’ll call, text, visit when we can.” I flipped my hand over, entwining our fingers. “I have holiday time. I can fly there and be with you.”