Page 86 of The Whole Package

And standing at the far counter, sleeves shoved up to his elbows, was Jamie.

My stomach dropped.

He looked up briefly. Ever so briefly. Enough for his expression to tighten before he looked away again.

Right. OK. He’s raging then. Fair enough. I did disappear and spend the night of Christmas Eve in a five-star establishment with my husband.

‘Harri!’ Claire shoved a peeler into my hand. ‘You roped me into helping. And I need help!’ Her eyes were popping out of her skull, like she was seriously regretting signing up for this episode of Hell’s Kitchen.

I grinned. ‘Thank you for coming,’ I said, meaning it, then I lunged for her, giving her a tight hug.

I could feel her giggle into my shoulder. ‘We need a serious debrief!’

I laughed. ‘We do, but after we’ve tackled the tatties.’

For the next few hours, I barely stopped moving. I peeled potatoes until my fingers cramped. Burned my hand on a tray of parsnips. Got screamed at by Sharon for ‘stirring my gravy all wrong’ despite the fact that the gravy literally looked the exact fucking same no matter who stirred it.

‘Harri, hen, taste this,’ Mum said, shoving a spoon towards me. I took one sip and nearly recoiled. ‘Jesus Christ, too much salt! Who done that?’

‘Sharon!’ My mum rolled her eyes.

‘A CAN FUCKING HEAR YE!’ Sharon yelled, face bright purple, as she mashed the mash.

I noticed Jamie laughing quietly from across the kitchen before catching himself. It was the first time I’d heard him make a sound since I’d arrived. Something warm twisted painfully in my chest, but we still hadn’t spoken.

The hours passed in a blur of heat and noise and chaos. And by the time dinner was finally getting plated up, I was exhausted. My hair was shoved into a messy bun with what I later realised was actual tinsel tangled through it. My mascara had fully given up. There was gravy down my top and icing sugar on my sleeve. I smelled like a literal pig in a blanket. Yet somehow, I’d never felt more like myself.

‘Right!’ Mum clapped her hands. ‘Main hall in five, everyone! There’s a queue outside, we can’t let people wait out there in that weather.’

A cheer went up around the kitchen. Everyone started grabbing trays and dishes. Everyone except Jamie. He quietly untied his apron and disappeared through the side door. I watched it swing shut behind him.

Shit.

‘Where are you off to?’ somebody called after him. He just lifted a hand vaguely without turning round.

Before I could talk myself out of it, I shoved my tray at Mags. ‘Back in a sec.’

‘If you’re abandoning us again, I’ll never forgive ye,’ she warned.