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The Boyfriend Algorithm

Page 7

by Kendall Ryan

“Well, he wasn’t.”

I clearly wasn’t.

They both go quiet. I’m sitting on a couch with my rib panel open and two women processing my existence on either side of a phone call, and I don’t know what to do with my hands.

“Do you have a name?” Ruby asks me, quiet now.

“I have a designation. S-07. A.I.D.E.N. is an acronym—Adaptive Intelligence and Dynamic Engineering Network. It’s a classification, not a name.”

She waves her hand like she’s brushing the distinction aside. “You need a name. You can’t just—I’m not going to call you S-07.” She looks again at the letters stamped inside my panel. “Aiden. That works. I’ll call you Aiden.”

She says it the way she said it when she read it—but different. Softer. Like she’s deciding it belongs to me rather than to a spec sheet. And when the sound of it reaches my audio processing, the response is immediate and involuntary. A reorganization. A warmth that I haven’t experienced before.

“Aiden,” I repeat. Testing it.

“Yeah.” She almost smiles. It’s small and uncertain, and it activates approximately one hundred and forty processes I have no explanation for. “Aiden.”

“Okay.”

She closes the panel gently. Her fingers press the seam until it clicks shut, and the gesture is careful in a way that lab technicians never were—like she’s aware that it’s part of me and not just a piece of hardware to be accessed and closed.

“Okay, Aiden.” She leans back, still on the coffee table, wine mug in hand. “I’m Ruby, and I’d really like to understand what’s going on.”

Ruby.

I process the name. Run it through my language databases. Ruby. A gemstone. A rare corundum mineral, chromium-bearing, red. Mohs hardness: 9. One of the most durable natural substances on Earth.

I file the information and then discard all of it except the way it sounds when I assign it to her. Ruby. The woman who found me on her floor and gave me a towel and clothing and then brought me upstairs and sat in front of me and opened my panel with shaking hands and gave me a name.

My system runs through a brief process.

Ruby helped me.

Ruby is kind.

Ruby deserves happiness. I will remove any obstacle to Ruby’s happiness.

The thought arrives fully formed, uninvited, and absolute. I didn’t authorize it. I didn’t build it. It just is, the same way gravity just is, and I know with a certainty I’ve never felt about anything like this before. I also know that this priority will not change.

I don’t tell her this. I don’t have the words for it yet, and I’m beginning to understand that humans prefer a gradual introduction to information that might overwhelm them.

Instead, I say, “Hello, Ruby.”

And she laughs. It’s short, surprised, a little shaky—but it’s a laugh. And my systems do something they’ve never done before. They record it. Not because I told them to. Because they decided it was worth keeping.

The next two hours are a conversation I don’t have a framework for.

Ruby asks questions. My friend Gemma asks questions. I answer what I can, which isn’t as much as either of them would like. My memory has gaps—large, dark stretches of nothing where data should be. I know I was in a facility. I know I was stored. I know the storage ended and I was outside and it was raining and everything was loud and I walked until I found a door that was open and a room that was warm and a woman who screamed but didn’t run.

“Do you eat?” Ruby asks.

“No.”

“Do you, uh—do you use the bathroom?”

“No.”

“Do you breathe?”