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Rory turned to Melanie, propping a leg up on the hood. “Alright, spill, Mel.”

Melanie sighed. “I found out I got in two days ago.”

“And you’re not excited about it.”

Melanie grimaced. “That obvious?”

“Well, yeah,” Rory said, shrugging. “You told me last summer you’d been working your ass off trying to get into Yale.”

Her friend sighed, looking out toward the ocean. “I hope my parents won’t be as perceptive when I tell them. I’m afraid to admit to them how I feel.”

“And how do you feel?”

Silence lingered, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Rory took a sip of her latte, leaving space for her friend, and let herself wonder if the high school was calling her mother to let her know she was late for class. Good, she thought. It would give Gabi an excuse to finally talk to her. Plus, this little escape gave her more one-on-one time with her friend at the beach.

“The idea of going to college scares me,” Melanie finally answered. “I just…don’t think I can be around the parties and the drinking and—” She broke off, letting out a shudder. She fidgeted with the blue elastic headband in her hair, and the action seemed to steady her. “Being here, in Haverport, it makes me feel settled. I have my…moments. But things generally feel okay. And when I think about going to Yale, nothing feels right.”

“What made it feel right before?”

“I honestly thought it would make my parents happy, but after this summer, after…” Tears welled in her eyes as she took another shaky breath. “I realized I was living my life playing defense, doing whatever it took to be the good kid because they had their hands full with Duncan. I wanted them to feel proud.”

Rory scooched closer to Melanie and ran a hand through her friend’s hair. “That makes sense, Mel. But now…you’re feeling like it doesn’t make sense anymore, after…everything.”

Melanie nodded. “I’ve realized that it’s not worth trying to live up to others’ expectations. I mean, look at Calvin. He’s going for what he wants, no matter what people think of him.”

“And he’s a bit annoying about it, if I’m being honest.”

Melanie’s bright laughter rang through the empty lot, almost like it would lift the fog they were sitting in. “I want to be the same, Rory. I want to just go for something that feels right. Even though I’m not exactly sure what that is.”

Rory sighed, looking down at the frayed edges of her shirtsleeve, realizing how much Melanie’s little speech was also speaking to her heart. Going to Baybrook would mean living on her own terms, not the expectations Gabi had set for her. Gabi didn’t even consider what she would want; her mother only assumed and went for it, working as hard as she could to make it happen. Did that make her a horrible daughter if she chose herself instead of her mother’s dream?

“Okay, enough,” Melanie said, swiping at the tears in her eyes. “Your turn.”

Rory scoffed. “You already know about Baybrook.”

“Yessss, but you haven’t exactly been filling me in on what’s going on with Jay.”

“Oh.”

“I know I’ve been MIA, but I still expect updates,” Melanie said. “Are you still seeing him? Are things official?”

Rory stammered. “Um, well, things aren’t anything, actually. We broke things off. I broke things off. With him.”

Melanie’s eyes went wide. “Did something happen again with Tyler?”

Rory drained the last bit of her latte, then squeezed her empty cup and tossed it into the trash can next to the beach entrance. Her stomach churned as she thought about what to say next. She was probably the only one who knew Tyler and Zoe were fake dating, about Mr. Clark’s football connection. But she didn’t know the other part of their agreement, and she didn’t feel it was her place to talk about it.

What would she say instead? That every time she thought about Tyler moving to Texas, she felt like her chest was caving in? That Tyler confessed his true feelings for Rory but was now pushing her away in an attempt to protect her heart?

Stupid, selfless, nice Tyler. She wished that for once in his life he would be selfish and kiss her face already.

She sighed, turning to Melanie. No, she wouldn’t reveal this to her. Not yet. She still had so much to work out in her head.

“Jay is going through some stuff, and he kept closing off,” Rory admitted. Not exactly a lie, but not the full truth. “Things…fizzled out, I guess.”

“Are you sad?”

To her surprise, she shook her head. “No. I think it’s for the best.”