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But it didn’t change what he did. The wreckage he’d left behind. The reckless, irresponsible actions that had resulted in tragedy.
“Tell you what, Joey,” Dakota was saying, “I don’t need you to help me. But if you want to show me you’re sorry, and you genuinely mean it, then you can help out at my next New Horizons project. We’re a couple of volunteers short.”
Wait. What now?
I jerked my head up to stare at her.
“New Horizons?” Joey asked. “What’s that? I mean, yes. Of course. Anything. But, uh… what would I be doing?”
Dakota smiled and launched into her spiel about retrofitting homes for people who’d suffered injuries or health disabilities that required renovations.
When we left Jerkers twenty minutes later, Joey having enthusiastically agreed to join the next New Horizons home retrofit, I walked with Dakota to her minivan.
“Are you sure about this?” I asked. “I know he looks like a kicked puppy, but it doesn’t change the fact he’s responsible for your injuries.”
“I know that.”
I pulled open the side panel of her van. “You’re in a better place now. Do you really want to think about the accident and the aftermath every time you see him?”
She pushed the button just inside the door, and the lift whirred to life, lowering toward the ground.
“Today wasn’t easy, Kit. You’re right about that.” She took a deep breath. “But can’t you see that Joey is hurting?”
“So, he’s got a guilty conscience. He should have one, don’t you think? He’d be a really disgusting human being if he didn’t.”
“Exactly. He seems like a good person who made a terrible mistake.”
I frowned. “So you’re going to forgive him, just like that?”
She rolled onto the lift, and I hit the button to raise her to the level of the van’s interior. She wheeled inside and locked her brake into place. “It’s not that simple. I worked through a lot of my anger in therapy, but it’s still there, you know?”
“Of course it is,” I said, leaning in against the doorframe. “How could it not be?”
“I think… no, I know that letting go of this last bit of resentment would be good for me. I want to move on, to leave that trauma behind me. So I’m letting Joey make amends, but it’s not just for him. It’s for me too.”
“But—”
“And maybe you need it too,” Dakota said, cutting me off. “You’re such a great brother, Kit. So kind and sweet. Your reaction the other night really disturbed me. It’s not like you to get angry. You’ve been so amazingly patient since my injury, even when Mom was a basket case there at first.”
“Someone needed to be strong for you.”
Her eyes softened. “Yeah, you stepped up for me. But I had no idea how much pain and anger you bottled up. I want you to think about that, think about what forgiving Joey might do for you, too, okay?”
I shook my head. “I don’t think I can.”
“Maybe not yet.” She smiled. “But I’ll wear you down, eventually.”
I barked a laugh. She probably fucking would. But unlike Dakota, I wasn’t so sure spending time with Joey would help her heal. What if it did the opposite and kept her living in her trauma? I didn’t want her desire to help Joey to interfere with her happiness.
“Just make me one promise,” I said.
“What?” Her tone was guarded, as if she knew where I was going already. She probably did.
“If being around him starts hurting more than helping, you let me step in.”
“Kit…”
“I’m serious. Joey is regretful, fine. If it’s good for you to let him make amends, fine. But the second it’s not good for you, you put yourself first and you let me put an end to it.”
