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After all, she wasn’t trying to impress any judges today. She was merely going to get on a horse for the first time in more than ten years.

Her stomach churned painfully, her nerves seeming to eat her from the inside out as Matthew finally faced her.

“Ready?” he asked.

She planted her feet securely on the ground and nodded.

“I can give you a leg-up,” Matthew offered. “Unless you’d prefer a mounting block?”

Winnie shook her head, stepping around to the horse’s left side where Matthew waited for her.

Her hands still shook, her legs as weak as jelly. She couldn’t believe she was about to do this, to disregard her dad’s direct orders—to sit atop this horse and to ride again.

She knew it had the potential to bring on a whole slew of issues. Craving riding day in and day out so she could no longer focus on work. Having Dad ridicule her for disobeying him and, worst of all, embarrassing him yet again by following this “childhood fantasy of becoming a horse girl.”

And yet, Winnie knew if she didn’t ride right now, she’d regret it for the rest of her life. So, with as much courage as she could muster, she moved toward Matthew.

He laced his fingers together and leaned low for her leg, but just before she placed her bent knee toward him, her breathing shallowed, and memories assaulted her.

The last time she’d ridden Goldilocks. The moment she’d been thrown. Dad’s words. The feeling of freedom atop her beloved animal.

Tears sprung to her eyes, and she backed away. Matthew instantly straightened, concern filling his features. “It’s all right,” he said.

His understanding and compassion stabbed at Winnie’s pride, and she turned away. “I just need a minute,” she said, trying to calm her breathing. “Sorry. This is just…” She broke off with a sigh. “This is just so embarrassing.”

“Hey,” Matthew said at once, moving around to face her directly. “Please, don’t be embarrassed. It’s perfectly understandable. There is nothing harder than getting back in the saddle. There are literal books written about it.”

But Winnie shook her head. “It’s not about getting back in the saddle,” she said, blinking away her tears. “It’s…It’s about not getting in the saddle again.”

He didn’t respond, allowing her time to continue.

“It’s been so long,” she whispered. “And I loved it so much. What am I going to do if I have to say goodbye to it all over again?”

His brow pulled together. “Why would you have to say goodbye if you don’t want to? I thought you chose to no longer ride.”

She looked up at him, tears brimming again. This time, she didn’t blink them away. This time, she allowed them to fall as she finally explained the truth.

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

Matthew listened intently, fighting off every inch of him that wanted to reach forward and comfort Winnie with a hug, because he knew, in that moment, she needed a listening ear more.

“It was my dad,” she said, sniffing as a tear trailed down her perfectly smooth cheek. “He never came to any of my shows. They were just silly and pointless to him. But as soon as I had the chance at reaching the Olympics, he invited all of his bigwig lawyer friends to watch me at the first event he ever attended. Of course that was the event I was thrown…” She trailed off, shaking her head. “He was so embarrassed. He couldn’t take it any longer.”

She looked away, and Matthew’s heart broke at the sight of her own pain written so clearly across her creased brow and tear-filled eyes.

“That night, he told me I’d embarrassed him and our whole family,” she said. “So he sold Goldilocks and told me I wouldn’t be riding anymore.”

Matthew’s mouth dropped open, the breath rushing from his lungs. He’d thought her horse had died. But then, Winnie had merely mentioned that she’d lost her. Never in his wildest dreams would he have thought this would have occurred.

Anger stirred in his chest, pushing his heart rate higher and higher until he thought it might burst. How could her dad have done such a thing? And for one simple mistake? Worst of all, how could he have ever admitted to being embarrassed by his own daughter for something like this?

“I’m so sorry,” Matthew said. “I had no idea.”

She shrugged, wiping away another tear. “It’s okay. It was just so painful to no longer ride. You always talk about having passion and heart in what you do.” Her voice broke. “That was where my passion was. That’s where my heart was—in riding. I begged and begged Dad to reconsider, but he said it was time for me to get a real job.” She trailed off with another sniff. “It was bad enough to no longer have Goldilocks. But to no longer ride altogether? It took me years to become numb to it. To think of actually being on a horse again is terrifying because I don’t want to go through the pain of not being on a horse again.”

Matthew nodded with complete understanding. How she’d even considered saying yes to this venture blew his mind. And yet, hadn’t she showcased her courage and tenacity throughout the entire trip? This woman would never cease to amaze him.

“I know it’s not all my dad’s fault,” she continued. “I’m old enough to make my own decisions now. I could have ridden, but I’ve just been so afraid of embarrassing him again.” She huffed out a soft, disbelieving laugh. “But that’s going to happen no matter how hard I try not to.”