Page 19 of See Through

“Say it, Aubs. You’ve got that look on your face.”

“Which look?” I play coy.

“The mischievous one.”

“I figured since we’ve done most of the places around here and nobody has gotten back to me, we could…” I trail off, not wanting to say it out loud, because I know how he’s going to react.

His eyes practically bulge out of his head. “No.”

“I haven’t even said anything!”

“You think after years of knowing you, I don’t know the look on your face right now?”

“Well, then what!” I throw my hands in the air.

“We are not investigating your old house.”

Sometimes, I hate that he can read my mind. “Why not?”

“How much time do you have?”

“All night if we need it,” I challenge.

“W-what about those other places you mentioned? What about Grand View and the serial killer? Or that one place in Maine?”

“It’s Grand Mountain,” I sigh. “I’ve been thinking about this for a while, Dean. Something has always been off in that house, and I think⁠—”

“You think your childhood home is haunted, and whatever is in there killed your brother?"

“When you put it like that, it sounds crazy.”

“Crazy isn’t the right word,” he tells me. “Dangerous is more like it. Aubs,” he grabs my hands, “it’s too personal, and I’m worried what might happen if we go.”

“Why? It’s my old house, and it’s just sitting there since my parents refused to sell it. It would be perfect and emotional, and it would make for a great video, since people know my story of why I started my channel in the first place⁠—”

“Aubrey, you don’t have to do this. You don’t have to use your own personal tragedy and market it to the masses for views. I just want you to think this through. I know how hard it is for you to walk back into that house. Don’t do this just to do this. You have nothing to prove to yourself or your parents.”

“That’s not what this is,” I lie. Maybe there is part of me that thinks this investigation will prove to my parents my career is serious and means something. Imagine if I got something from Adrian on record. Would they deny what I do so vehemently if their own son was the one talking to them from beyond? “Why are you so against this anyway? It’s my life and trauma I’m walking back into, not yours.”

He shakes his head, dropping my hands as he moves away from me. “You still don’t see it do you?”

“What?”

“I care about you, Aubrey. You know that. All I’ve wanted since seeing you collapse into my arms after your brother died is for you to be happy. I don’t think this is a good idea, especially since you’re still blaming yourself for what happened to Adrian.”

My hair falls in front of my face as I stare at my feet. I know he’s right, but it still pisses me off.

“It’s my channel, Dean. I have the final say, remember?”

He nods. “You gave me permission to veto anything if it got too crazy, remember? When we started this, you promised you wouldn’t do anything that put you in harm’s way. What do you call this, huh? What do you call provoking whatever was in that hospital a few weeks ago? I would call it dangerous, Aubs. You’re teetering on the edge of something that’s scaring the crap out of me.”

I’m frozen where I stand. We haven’t talked about this since, but he’s right. I hate that he’s right. Maybe part of me is finally punishing myself for what happened to my brother, or maybe I have a death wish or something, but I am being stupid. I did provoke those spirits, which means I am still blaming myself. I can't help it. He was my twin brother. I was born three minutes before him; I was supposed to be his protector, and ever since he died, I’ve wondered if it was truly an accident or if something more malevolent was at play.

Now that I have the means to find out, Dean is trying to stop me.

I poke the center of his chest. “Why do you care so much? It’s my life and my story. He was my brother. I should be allowed to tell his story as I see fit, and this is how I want to do it, Dean.”

“Because I care about you, and if you get hurt, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself, Aubs. You are the best thing to happen to me, and I can’t bear to lose you to the ghosts or the grief or any of it. I won’t do it. I won’t lose my favorite person on the planet to something I could have stopped!”