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I barely settled her onto her bare feet, though I kept holding her from behind, my arms locked around her waist. Like in doing so, I could reiterate the promise I had made.

I would never leave her.

No matter how fucking painful that might be. No matter what I lost.

She had no clue the choice I’d made.

The price that had been paid.

Didn’t know what that oath I made so many years ago had cost.

The tattoo running up my arm burned. This thing I mourned every day, yet I was sure I never would have changed it. Torn between two meanings.

“I don’t ever want you to.” Elena’s murmured words came like the fluttering of wings against my ear.

I somehow managed to hug her tighter. “I won’t.”

I swayed her like that for the longest time, breathing her in.

Apples and cinnamon.

The sweetest fucking fruit.

I had to peel myself away from her lure.

Forced myself to step back five feet.

Her shoulders sagged, and she let go of a ragged exhale.

“I talked to your brothers and Phoenix.” I pushed it into the tension like it could stand the chance of obliterating whatever the fuck had just transpired between us.

Inhaling deep, she resituated herself. Doing her best to piece herself back together when I kept chipping fragments away and stealing them for myself.

She slanted her attention toward me for a beat as she moved back to the stove. “What did they say?”

“They agree that it’s likely Shayne Ellison sending a message. Letting us know he’s watching.”

A shiver ripped down her spine.

She dunked the spoon back into the pot, her focus on the soup, like the simmering mixture might form into every answer that she sought. “You think he’s really out there?”

I moved to rest my hip against the counter and crossed my arms over my chest. “Probably. But it’s not like we haven’t faced down a million monsters just like him. We’ll get it taken care of.”

Elena barely flinched.

She knew exactly what that meant.

I wondered how she could be so alive and vibrant and full of belief when she knew a whole lot of what we were involved in.

When she’d been subject to the evil we fought.

“It will never end, will it?” It was so quiet, I could barely hear it.

My head shook. “Not in Crimson Crows’ lifetime.”

This was our lot.

Hesitation billowed. Pushed at my insides. Compelling me to cling to the few morals I possessed.