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Waiting in line, I find myself thinking about motherhood and a bit of the wind is knocked from my sails at the thought that I’ll probably never be a mum. Given my own mum’s less than stellar example and my general troubled state of chaos, it’s probably not in the stars for me.

While I’m a modern woman, independent and making my own money...I always envisioned myself a wife first, building a family with a man I love.

That was before my illusions of grandeur were crushed of course.

I think it has more to do with having what I didn’t, than living a stereotype. Family can be all sorts of things. Look at Teddy, Piers and myself. We’re a family. Were.

Are. I hope.

A family that’s expanding and I’m currently on the verge of being kicked out of. Because of my own issues. Jealousy, anger and inadequacy.

My determination to remain positive seems to be going right in the rubbish as I began ticking off all the ways I’ve jeopardized and self-sabotaged.

Those issues are another reason why I’ll probably never have a family to call my own.

I shake the ugly thoughts from my head, as I stand waiting for my drink.

“Scarlett?” A handsome blonde Adonis in a navy three-piece suit is calling my name. Feeling rather self-conscious at being caught zoning out, I smile politely at him as his eyes glance down and back up rather quickly. “Scarlett, right?”

“Hello…” I start, hoping he will fill me in, confused as to how he knows me. Surely I would have remembered meeting him. “I’m sorry, I haven’t had a proper dose of caffeine yet, do I know you?”

“You don’t.” He chuckles to himself. “But you are Scarlett with two venti’s to go?”

He must read the confusion on my face plain as day.

“They’re calling your name. Your order is ready.” He smiles and gestures to where two white cups wait for me on the counter.

“Oh, yes. Uh- thank you.” I offer as I grab my cups and rush to leave.

“My name is Max, by the way.” He offers with a wink, as he steps in my path to hold the door open for me.

“Thank you, Max.” I call over my shoulder as I rush down the street where I’m parked. Not today, Max. Not today.

He would have been totally my type. Before.

Instead of a Greek god, I find now I’m into someone a little darker… a bit more rugged, a lot less polished.

As if I’ve conjured him up, my mobile vibrates again.

I ignore it until I’m at work and I feel my mobile buzzing a few more times through the soft leather of my bag as I ride the lift up to my office.

Dropping Mina’s coffee at her desk, she gushes her thanks and I wave my hand not wanting to make a big fuss of it.

“No problem, welcome back.” I smile. “Please hold my calls for the day.” I tell her, as I hide away in my office. Barricaded in the one place I'm sure to be able to lose myself, and clear my mind.

Falling into my chair with a sigh I take the lid off my coffee to let it cool.

Firing up my laptop I checked my emails, trying to ignore the phone that taunting me, from the bag beneath my desk. I've waited as long as I could which is about the equivalent of two minutes. Five more messages.

Sexy Pirate: Scarlett please just reply so I know that you're okay.

Sexy Pirate: I know you're angry, please just answer the damn message so I know that you're okay!

Sexy Pirate: If I was there I would bend you over my knee for your insubordination!!!

Thought of his hands on me in that way have me pressing my thighs together, there's nothing quite like having your body owned by someone like Cohen.

I could do with him owning me day and night. But it's the possibility of him owning my heart, that scares me the most.