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That earned her a little laugh. “It took a great deal of getting used to, especially since the servants knew me first as the governess, but they insisted on it. Warthing in particular is a tyrant for proper address. Now, since this isn’t one of your days off and you most certainly aren’t hidden away in that huge house up north, I assume there’s been some rule-breaking afoot.”
Jane’s gaze dropped to her hands, folded so tightly in her lap that the creases of her knuckles had gone ghostly white.
“Oh, Jane, what’s the matter?” Mary rose and crossed the gap between them, joining her on the sofa. “Tell me what happened.”
“I fell in love.” The words sounded so simple when she said them out loud—as though there wasn’t a complicated thing about the entire matter.
Mary’s face lit up. “Well, that’s wonderful! When do we meet him? Have you told Elizabeth?”
She shook her head. “It’s not wonderful. He’s a baron and he has sisters and everything is awful.”
The tears she couldn’t shed before suddenly broke free. She dropped her head into her hands and sobbed for Nicholas, her position, and her future. But mostly she sobbed for herself and the woman she might have been—a woman who might have grasped what she wanted if only her conscience had released its grip on her.
Any governess knows that a child will eventually cry itself dry, and it turns out that grown women are just the same. After a while, her tears began to slow into hiccuping gasps. Jane became aware of Mary sitting next to her as her friend rubbed slow, soothing circles on her back. The door to the sitting room opened softly, and there was the clink and rattle of a tea tray being placed down somewhere to her left.
“Thank you, Warthing,” said Mary in a low voice. “If you would also ask Lord Asten to stay close to home today, that would be appreciated.”
“When Lord Asten inquired about who had called, I told him Miss Ephram was here. He asked me to inform you that he will remain in his study until you require him. Also, I hope you won’t think me too forward, my lady, but I sent the carriage to collect Mrs. Fellows.”
Elizabeth was coming. At least that was a little comfort to her bruised heart. The three of them would be together again, even if for the first time since they’d met not one of them was a governess any longer.
“Thank you, Warthing,” Mary said. “That was excellent thinking.”
The door shut again, and Mary’s ministrations stopped. “Jane, I’m going to pour you a cup of tea, and you’re going to have one of Cook’s excellent lemon cakes while we wait for Elizabeth. Then we’re going to figure this all out.”
She raised her head, knowing that she must look a fright, with her tear-stained face and her hair all askew, and not caring a whit about it. She had one important thing she must ask Mary before she explained anything else.
She swallowed and gripped her friend’s hand. “A few months ago you told me that if I ever needed somewhere to live—”
“You’ll stay with us for as long as you like. The rest of your life if it suits you. That’s why I wanted Eric to stay close. I know he’ll be worrying, and the first thing he’ll do is offer you a home. This is your home and will be as long as we live here. Rose Hollow too.”
She could almost laugh if she wasn’t so incredibly sad. An estate in the country and a house in the fashionable part of town. What more could a woman of no means or property wish for? It turned out a lot more.
Warthing must’ve dispatched the carriage mere minutes after Jane arrived, because in less than a half hour, Elizabeth, who was still hardly showing the signs of expecting her first child, rushed through the sitting room door to envelop her in a hug.
“Whoever he is and whatever he did, he’s awful,” Elizabeth announced.
The back of Jane’s eyes prickled. “How do you know it’s a man?”
“Because,” Elizabeth said with a sigh, “I’ve felt the way you look.”
She sniffled. “Nicholas is wonderful, and I don’t know what to do.”
“Those are the very worst kinds of cads,” said Elizabeth with a nod. “They’re the good ones who make themselves impossible to forget. Now, tell me everything.”
The story of how she’d met Nicholas rushed out all at once. She didn’t hold back any details—even when it came to the one blissful night they’d spent wrapped up in each other in the Pritchers’ hayloft. She wasn’t ashamed, not in front of these friends. They’d each made their own sacrifices for love, choosing to risk their positions for the chance at happiness. Elizabeth and Mary had each managed to turn that happiness into lifelong love. Jane didn’t believe that lightning would strike three times.
When she was finally done, Elizabeth frowned and said, “If I ever see this Lord Hollings, I’ll stomp on his toes. In boots.”
A little choked laugh bubbled up in Jane. “I tell you that entire story and you want to step on his shoes?”
“I can’t be too harsh. He wanted to marry you, and that shows a good amount of sense, if you ask me.”
“Plus, he sounds rather dashing,” said Mary with a sparkle in her eye.
“Oh, he is. Far too dashing for his own good, yet I don’t think he knows it,” Jane said with a sigh.
In a way, it had been so easy for her to fall for Nicholas. He’d been so kind, so thoughtful, while they’d ridden together. Even when he’d been annoyed at the theft of his horse—which wasn’t her fault—and the manner in which she’d essentially bribed him to take her with him—most certainly her fault—he’d still attended to her, trying to make her as comfortable as possible by ensuring that they stopped every few hours so she could stretch her legs and continue their journey with as much dignity as she could muster.