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“Shelton.” He didn’t know it yet, but I’d be doing the asking right after this awkward conversation.

“So, you and Shelton are going on another date?” If I didn’t know Ozzie as well as I did, I wouldn’t be able to detect the thin string of alarm lacing his words.

“Yep. He’s… amazing. We could sit and talk about numbers and widgets all day. I like him a lot.”

“Wow, I’m glad that’s working out for you.” The words came out bitter.

“Yeah, everything is so fucking great.”

In preparation for the party, I decided I needed to look the hottest I’d ever looked. There was only one person who could help me with this, and she was currently sifting through my closet, casting judgment. “Overalls, more overalls. Overalls but make it a dress.” Fancy turned to me. “Do you have any real clothes?”

“I have dresses.” I pulled out a blue striped dress.

“Eww, that’s not even your color.”

“I have a color?”

“We all have colors that favor our skin tones. It’s called color analysis. I had it done in Japan a few years ago. Take me, for instance: I’m a deep autumn. Pinks, yellows, purples—I mean, really any bright color.” She scanned my body, and I felt like a contestant on that once-popular reality modeling show, waiting for Fancy to tell me to pack my things and go home. “I bet you’re a winter.”

“Hmm, I do like cold weather, so it’s possible.” I wasn’t smart enough for this conversation.

“Tell me about Shelton.”

“Why?”

“Because it paints a picture. If I know how you feel about him then I’ll know what you need to wear to get him to feel the same.”

“Okay, I’ll play along. He’s an accountant. He lives with his parents.”

“Interesting. Like in his childhood bedroom, or…”

“I think he took over the basement.”

“Nice, okay, wow. Aside from that, how does he make you feel?”

“Uhm…” I hadn’t given any of this much thought. Shelton was just a regular guy. He wasn’t extraordinary in any way.

Fancy opened my dresser drawer, pulling out a black lace bra and holding it to her chest. “Does he make your pussy throb?”

I snatched my brassiere from her hands, stuffing it back into my unmentionables drawer. “No, that is not a description I would use for him.”

“Those mild-mannered guys are the true freaks. Edison is a prime example.”

“Nope, I don’t want to hear about you and my baby brother’s sexual escapades.”

“Right, sorry.” She cleared her throat. “Back to you and Shelton. Do you wanna sleep with him?”

“He’s a very nice guy.” My cheeks warmed with embarrassment. I never expected I’d be having this conversation with Fancy, of all people.

“And do you want him to use his very nice dick on you?”

I tossed the blue dress on the bed. “This was a mistake.”

“No, it wasn’t. I’m locked in. All I’ve ever wanted was to get invited to your bedroom to do girly stuff. Like listen to music and paint our nails.”

Since she’d started dating Edison, I’d gotten to know Fancy better. She had this saccharine-sweet personality and the sincerest put me in, Coach attitude. The jury was still deliberating on the possibility of a friendship, but she was kind of growing on me. “That’s your dream?”

“It was when I was twelve. I’ve always admired you.” She reached for my hand. “We could be best friends.”