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“The hot chocolate and baking powder,” Jake reminded him. “But what went wrong? Avery’s the best.”
Theo wished his good-hearted little brother would learn when not to punch him in the stomach like that. He shrugged. “We argued, that’s all.”
“You guys argue all the time,” Jake pushed.
“Not like this.”
“Do you need to apologize?”
Theo chuckled sadly. “Probably, yeah.”
“Then apologize,” Jake said. “Mrs. Ruiz says when you hurt someone, you have to take accountability.”
“Mrs. Ruiz is smart,” Theo said, still doing his awkward lean-walk as he pushed the cart with his forearms. “You pick out the hot chocolate for Evelyn.”
Jake took his time, carefully examining his options. He picked up two options, scrutinized them both, and then started to put one into the cart before stopping and choosing the other one. “So you’re going to apologize to her?”
“It’s a little more complicated than that,” Theo said. He thought about the message he’d gotten from Avery that was still sitting, unanswered, on his PopTalk. He knew she wanted to talk, but he also didn’t know what to say. Or how to fix things, because he still wasn’t totally sure why she’d gotten so mad. Tommy and Grace had both separately messaged him to encourage him to talk to her, but now he was the one feeling skittish. Theo didn’t like feeling like he’d done something wrong when the other person was just as culpable, and he didn’t feel like apologizing quite yet, no matter what Mrs. Ruiz said.
Jake looked at him, puzzled, and for an odd moment Theo felt the hairs on the back of his neck standing up. He felt like he was being watched, but when he turned around, all he saw were other last-minute shoppers. None of them were anyone he recognized, and no one was watching him. “Okay, but—”
“Just trust me, okay, Jake? It’s complicated. Let’s go get the wrapping paper before it’s all gone and Evelyn somehow makes that my fault too.”
It was snowing again. And on Christmas Day, which made it so picturesque Theo almost wanted to puke. Itasca really could be beautiful, and as he stared out his bedroom window at the small copse of pine trees, their boughs laden with piles of fluffy, sparkly snow, he had to admit that Karl’s hometown had some minor appeal, at least aesthetically speaking.
A branch swayed, the snow dumping down into the otherwise unmarred spread of lawn. Theo assumed it was a deer, or else a squirrel jumping from branch to branch. Next door the Yangs’ brightly colored Christmas lights reflected off the snow, giving things almost a disco effect as snowflakes winked pink and blue and green and yellow as they fell. He lay down in his bed, listening to the silence. Evelyn was gone, appeased by the whole family patiently attending church with her the night before and the family dinner they’d had tonight. She wouldn’t return with her blizzard of well-meaning but irritating questions for at least a few days now, so he had some peace for the foreseeable future.
Something hit his window. It sounded small, so small he thought he imagined it. But then there was another tiny ping, and then another, rattling the glass ever so slightly. Theo peeled himself off the bed, wondering if somehow the snow had turned to hail—and if it had, just how fucked was the climate—just in time for another tiny pebble to ricochet off the frame. He looked back toward the trees, and his heart did what it had kept threatening to do the entire time he was shopping with Jacob. It stopped, and didn’t start back up for what felt like two whole minutes.
Theo stared at Avery, who was standing in boots and her navy blue coat, snow clumping in her hair, underneath the trees on the boundary between his backyard and the neighbors’. She stared back, and eventually he broke, unlatching the window and pushing up the sash.
Avery saw him opening it and hurried across the lawn. “What the hell are you doing?” he whispered, careful to keep his voice down. Tiffany and Karl were probably already asleep, but he didn’t want to draw their attention if they were still up.
“Getting your attention,” she whispered back through the screen. A breeze blew in, chilling him through the T-shirt and boxers he wore to bed and sending snowflakes swirling around her head.
“And?”
“Are you ever going to respond to my Pop?”
“You walked over here, in the snow, on Christmas, to throw rocks at my window and ask about a message on fucking PopTalk?”
“Obviously not just that, but it is the first part. We’re best friends, Theo, and you won’t even respond?”
“Are we best friends?” he asked, arms crossed. “You seemed pretty done with me last time I saw you.”
“We were, and we could be again, if you’d just talk to me.”
“Seems like we’re talking now.”
“Fine. I’m fucking sorry,” she spat, sounding not sorry in the slightest.
“Wow, powerful apology,” he said dryly. “You’re definitely forgiven.”
“Look, I just want to talk, and—”
“And my backyard, in the snow, on—let me repeat—Christmas Day was the only time you could think of to have this conversation?”
“Well, it wasn’t like you gave me much other choice. You won’t respond to my messages, and you wouldn’t even look at me at Dartboard yesterday.” Theo wanted to protest that he hadn’t actually seen her because he’d been avoiding any woman who looked even a little bit like her, but he didn’t think that would go over well. Another wind gust had them both shivering. “Are you going to let me in?” she asked.
