Page 26

The way I’ve taught myself to control the violence that permanently lurks in my brain.

Hudson turns to her, flashing a casual smile, assuming he has any fucking right to be in the same universe as her. He thinks he deserves her presence, to have her attention focused on him instead of searching the library for me?

“It’s cool, no hard feelings,” he says with a shrug that makes me want to dislocate his shoulders. “I can only imagine I’d be having a rough time too if I were in your position.”

If he were in her position. I could laugh.

He could never comprehend how strong she is, how if he were in her position, he’d crumble like a fucking cookie. He’d never last a day in mine either; he doesn’t know how she needs to be protected, cherished, and kept safe from the snakes that circle her. Because he’s one of them.

I grip the leg of the table so hard my knuckles turn white. The wood creaks under the pressure, and I force myself to ease up before I break something.

And then, as if she wanted to grab my heart and rip it straight from my chest, Wynnie smiles at him. That captivating, sweet smile that she shared with me when we chatted. The smile I convinced myself was reserved for me. It’s sacred.

Tunnel vision takes over the edges of my eyesight. This isn’t happening.

“I was wondering if you were free tonight. I’d like to make it up to you, and if I’m being honest, I’m really, really lonely without anyone around.”

I am right fucking here.

I’ve been there every fucking day for a long time, watching over her. I’ve killed for her—multiple times, and she’s lonely?

That cuts deeper than any blade ever could. Deeper than the knife that went into Caleb’s body, over and over again.

“Oh, yeah, Wynn. I’m totally down.”

“I was thinking, maybe we could go to Sweet Scoops, then back to my place for a movie or something?”

It’s official: she’s lost her damn mind.

Sweet Scoops is mine. Well, ours now. Antonio—my Antonio—made her the best strawberry sundae, and her laughter filled my ears. I watched her lick the remnants of her ice cream with that pink tongue that fills my dreams.

Fuck.

I shared a place with her that’s so fucking special to me. The place where I spent some of the last moments I ever had with my mom. And now she’s going to take him there. She’s going to take Hudson to our place.

Another stab right through the heart into the soul.

“I’ll pick you up at seven,” she says with a smile.

Hudson flashes her a wink, and I want nothing more than to yank that eyeball out with my bare hands. I want to rush him and crush his skull until his brain leaks from his ears.

But what happens next breaks something inside of me I didn’t even know could break.

I watch, stomach churning, blood burning, as she places a soft, barely-there brush of her lips against his cheek. A kiss. She just fucking kissed him!

The same lips that smile at me.

That says my name.

The ones I fantasize about kissing.

The world doesn’t just stagger; it shatters completely. I’m up before I consciously decide to move, shoving my laptop and papers into my bag with frantic, jerking motions. My chair scrapes across the tile, and several students look up from their books with annoyed faces.

I don’t care. I need to leave before I throw a fucking chair across the room at Hudson’s face, then wrap my hands around his neck right here in front of everyone. Before I show Wynnie who I am in the worst possible way.

Wynnie’s eyes lock on mine as I pass the counter, and for a split second, I see something there. Recognition, maybe, or surprise. Her lips part slightly, and I think she’s going to call out to me. Ask me to stay.

Stupid of me to assume, because when Hudson says something, she laughs and turns her attention back to him. I’m dismissed as nothing—as if I’m just another stranger in the library instead of the man who would burn the world to the fucking ground to keep her safe.