Page 26

I don’t know what I expected when I agreed to come stay with Diego, not that I was given much time to dwell on the subject, but I’m not sure anything could have prepared me for hiding out in his bedroom for hours a day, wrestling with this constant desire to be around him. He took the news of becoming a father far better than I expected and I’ve been so alone in this pregnancy for so long that all I want to do is share everything with him, tell him all about the things he’s missed. My stomach twists. I could kick myself for how long I put off telling him about our baby and I’m not one to obsess over the past but if I could go back in time, I would do everything differently because Diego deserves better. Especially when he’s gone out of his way to keep me safe from Luca.

My mind drifts to the one other lengthy conversation we’ve had in the last two days in which he asked me to describe everything that happened in the alley on Friday night and informed me that when the police got there, the body of that man was gone. Luca and Gio apparently had time to get him out of there but the cops did find the pool of blood where he died as well as one of the knives that had been kicked under a dumpster in the struggle but other than that, you’d never even know anything happened. It’s unnerving how easy it is for someone to completely disappear with no trace and I can’t help but wonder if I’ll meet the same fate if those two are able to get their hands on me. I shudder, exiling those possibilities from my mind before they can torment me too much. Diego also described the scene he witnessed when he searched my house after Luca and Gio tore through there, looking for any sign of me or where I might have gone. The look in Luca’s eyes when I ran from him pops into my mind and all I can do is thank God that I had the sense to not go back to my place that night. A wave of nausea rushes over me and I turn away from Diego, chewing on my bottom lip as I mentally kick myself for my recent stupidity.

Let’s be honest, I’ve gone out with some real assholes, Luca included, and despite being extremely careful, there was always a chance I could have ended up pregnant by any of them which would have been a complete fucking disaster. God… there was Mike, who referred to himself in the third person and smacked the ass of any woman who walked past us when we were out but I knew he would never get too attached so, in a sense, he was a safe option. Plus, he was decent in bed so I kept him around for far longer than I probably should have. Or I could have been knocked up by Cal, who had a stellar dick game but made me so mad that I almost smashed my car into a pole on occasion just to shut him the fuck up. Jesus, and don’t even get me started on James. I barely hold back a groan as I try to avoid reliving that period of my life.

Peeking back at Diego, I cross my arms over my chest and shrink in my seat. As far as baby daddies go, I could have done so much worse than this man. Now that he knows, now that he’s promised to be here for me and our baby, there is no doubt in my mind that he will do just that. I don’t worry that he will change his mind and walk away or that he will treat me with anything less than the respect I deserve. He’s the kind of man that they write stories about, the type of guy that songs are dedicated to - kind, honorable, true - and I know that I’ve been so damn unfair to him throughout this process. I wish I could say that knowing that will snap me out of it but I can’t make that promise because the attraction that led to us being locked away in my bedroom for three damn days is still there and I want him. Jesus, knowing how good it is between us and how amazing he can make me feel only makes me want him more but it’s such a bad idea. When I lay in his bed at night, I can smell him in the sheets around me and all I can think about is the feeling of his hands on my skin, the fire in his eyes every time he slid inside me, and how fucking good it felt to be wrapped around him. It’s driving me out of my damn mind and then, there is the fact that he kissed me just forty-eight hours ago. The memory of the kiss pops into my mind and my lips tingle with the remnants of it as I shift in my seat, desperately trying to shove the feeling away but the damn thing refuses to let me be. Maybe it’s because I wasn’t expecting it that the kiss has haunted me for the last two days or it could be the fact that I’m carrying the man’s baby in my belly but something was definitely different and I didn’t like it.

Except that I really, really did.

“Isabelle Hutton.” The same nurse from before stands in the doorway with my file in her hand as she scans the room, searching for me, and I stand, flashing her a polite smile as I rest a hand on top of my little bump. I couldn’t help but notice that my belly was a little more pronounced this morning, like this little baby knew that now was its time to shine since I finally revealed the secret of its existence to everyone that needed to know. For the first time in my pregnancy, things just feel right… you know, besides the whole being hunted down and possibly murdered by Luca and his friend slash henchman person. Diego places his hand at the small of my back, pulling me out of my thoughts, as we follow the nurse into the back and down a long hallway to an exam room.

We step inside and the nurse instructs me to sit on the exam table and Diego sinks into one of the two chairs lined up against the wall as she sets my file down on the counter and pulls the stethoscope from around her neck. She begins taking my vitals as well as asking me all of the usual questions and it’s perfectly normal but a flutter of nerves races through my belly. Since the attack, I haven’t had any pain or bleeding, nothing that would indicate that there is something wrong, and yet, there is a tiny little voice in my head screaming at me that there is something wrong with the baby. The nurse slides the blood pressure cuff around my arm and I struggle to take a deep breath as I repeatedly tell myself that everything is fine but that other voice just won’t shut the hell up. The machine beeps as the cuff around my arm deflates and the nurse scowls at the screen before switching it off and scribbling the number down in my chart. My stomach drops and my heart kicks in my chest as I try to focus on anything else but memories of the baby I lost keep ambushing me, filling me with the pain I’ve kept locked away for so long.

“Okay,” she says, turning back to me with a smile. “The doctor will be in shortly.”

I watch her walk out of the room as my heart climbs into my throat, choking me, and my mind spins with rapid fire questions.

Was something wrong?

Did she see something that will have the doctor concerned?

What if the hospital missed something and the baby was hurt when Luca tackled me?

Oh, God, what if…

I can’t… I can’t lose another baby… I won’t survive it.

As if on cue, the baby delivers a kick to my ribs, letting me know that he or she is perfectly fine, almost like it could sense my total panic. Hell, it probably could. My sister bought me one of the What to Expect When You’re Expecting books and I only got through four chapters before I shoved it in the back of my closet and forgot about it so what do I know? Maybe this baby feels the dread I feel before each appointment and the rush of relief when the doctor reassures me that everything is okay. Closing my eyes, I suck in a breath and thank my sweet little peanut for the added reassurance as I press a hand to my belly.

“Is the baby kicking?” Diego asks and my eyes snap open, meeting his gaze across the room. He leans forward in his chair, toying with the ring on his right hand as he tilts his head to the side and glances down at my belly. His eyes find mine again, almost pleading with me, and the look on his face is so eager, so pure, that it breaks my heart. As I’ve been hiding in his bedroom for the last two, this baby has kicked the crap out of me and I’ve been so focused on the weirdness between us that it never even occurred to me that he might like to feel his child kick.

“Do you want to feel?”

He looks between my belly and me again before he nods and stands, closing the distance between us and looking at me for approval before he touches me. The baby kicks again and I grab his hand, placing it near the spot of the last strike. His warmth sinks into my skin and despite the shirt between us, it still conjures up memories of our weekend together, memories of just laying in bed with him after hours of sex so hot that I thought I might die mid-orgasm and the tender way he brushed my hair out of my face as we talked about nothing in particular. But why? Why the hell am I remembering the moments that didn’t have anything to do with sex just as much as the moments that do?

“I don’t feel anything,” he whispers, pulling me out of my thoughts, and I shake my head as I fight back a smile.

“Just give them a second.” As soon as the words are out of my mouth, the baby kicks right where Diego’s hand is, almost like they know their daddy is here, and his lips part in a silent gasp as his eyes find mine.

“Holy shit, that’s wild.”

I let out a little laugh. “You should feel it from my side.”

The door to the room opens and Diego yanks his hand away like a naughty teenager as Dr. Deaton steps into the room, flashing me a wide smile before she stops. Her gaze flicks between Diego and me as she shuts the door behind her.

“Hello.” She extends her hand toward Diego. “I’m Dr. Deaton and you are?”

“Diego Rodriguez. I’m… uh…”

“He’s the baby’s father,” I supply when he can’t quite find the words but I can’t blame him. Knowing you’re going to be a parent and saying it out loud for the first time are two very different things and it takes a little time to get used to. Dr. Deaton’s smile grows as she gives the two of us an approving nod.

“Excellent! Happy to have you here with us,” she says and I nod in agreement. I’ve been completely open with Dr. Deaton so she knows everything about the situation between Diego and me and she’s been encouraging me to tell him the truth for a while now.

“Thanks. Happy to be here,” Diego answers, glancing over at me and I resist the urge to shrink on the table. Things seem okay between us now but I feel so stupid for building the conversation with him up so much in my head that I was too terrified to actually do it for months.

“Izzy, I read over the report from the emergency room and it sounds like you’ve been through an awful ordeal but I think, all in all, you got very lucky.”

I nod. “Yes, I did.”