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“You know,” someone says, stepping up beside me and I turn as Ali flashes me a smile. “It’s okay to forgive him.”

“It’s not in my nature,” I tell her and she snorts out a laugh.

“Yeah, I’ve kind of picked up on that but you should try anyway. Lincoln is a good man – the kind that would never make this mistake again.”

I scoff, watching him as he raises the beer bottle to his lips. “He lied to me.”

“Oh, trust me, honey, I know. I already read him the riot act once for what he did to you but I also know he didn’t mean anything by it. He was torn in half by his loyalty to the club and his love for you – something that no one could have predicted.”

“He still should have told me the truth and he had so many chances to.”

Carly steps up on my other side and sighs. “It’s not that simple. This club – they’re a family – and he would take a bullet for any one of those guys just as they would take one for you simply because Kodiak loves you. That’s not an easy thing to betray and I’m sure that it haunted him everyday.”

“Both Carly and I,” Ali adds, “have been through some shit and the entire club stepped up for us without a moment’s hesitation. They’ve taken us both in as family and loving one of these men means that you won’t always know what’s going on but you have to trust him. He lies to you to keep you safe or to keep someone else safe.”

“Say he had told you the truth,” Emma says and we all turn to face her. “When he first met you, if he had spilled his guts, would you have ever let him into your life?”

I shake my head. “No, I don’t think I would have.”

She gives me a look that screams “exactly” and I sigh as I turn back to the window, wondering if I’ll ever be able to handle Lincoln lying to me regularly even if it was to save someone.

* * * *

“Tate, it’s not safe to be out here,” Lincoln growls, stepping out onto the screened in porch and I grab the pistol out of my lap, holding it up for him to see.

“I just needed a little fresh air.”

He sighs, sinking into the chair next to the door as he studies me. “Did you have fun at the barbecue?”

“Yeah,” I murmur, a soft smile gracing my face. “It was really nice to spend time with everyone.”

“You seem different.”

I meet his gaze and shrug as I remember the talk I had with the girls. “Maybe a little bit. Can I ask you something?”

Shock blankets his face and he stares at me for a second before slowly nodding. “Of course.”

“How much did you know when you started following me?”

“I… uh, I knew your name and Theo’s name. I knew what you looked like and all the basic information like your address. And that your mom had died.”

I think back to the morning I found the camera feed on his phone and the photo of Theo and me on the beach. “That picture you had, where we were spreading Mom’s ashes. Was that when you started watching me?”

“Just about,” he answers with a nod and I sigh.

“When did you learn everything?”

“Tate,” he whispers, leaning back in his chair as he shakes his head.

“I want to know.”

Sighing, he stands up and pulls his chair closer to mine so our knees are touching. “The night that I had to bail on Road House.”

“Oh,” I whisper, sucking in a breath. “And you never once thought to tell me?”

“Baby, I almost told you every fucking day. It was killing me but there was nothing I could do. I couldn’t betray Blaze and I couldn’t walk away from you either.”

I narrow my eyes. “You keep saying that but no one forced you to do any of this.”